Meredith Law lay in the grass.
She had died.
She knew that.
Was this Heaven?
Meredith wondered if she'd actually go to Heaven.
She didn't know. The grass was itchy and she thought she was lying in dirt.
And someone was very rudely shaking her shoulder.
So Meredith decided to yell at them.
"Hey! Stop that!" She grumped, pulling herself into a sitting position.
Eyebrows and green spandex.
Huge eyebrows and too much green spandex.
Meredith Law promptly passed out.
When she woke up, she was laying on a bed.
In a hospital.
Meredith was slowly realizing what had happened. Her parents must have come to their senses. And got rid of the body. Maybe she'd been found by a jogger.
In spandex.
So she opened her eyes.
Meredith was surprised to see a....somewhat old-fashioned hospital.
"Umm. What happened to my parents?" She asked the nurse checking her vitals.
"Oh! You're awake. Would you like some water?"
Meredith raised an eyebrow. "No, I want to know what happened to my parents!"
The woman seemed confused. "Sorry, but you seemed to be the only one found in the forest. Were your parents ninja?"
Meredith blinked. "No. But-but, they were hurting me with their bottles, and I was probably near a Dumpster, a-and-"
"What's a dumpster?"
That's it.
Meredith was going to strangle this bitch nurse.
But first.
Escape time!
Meredith jumped up, somewhat wobbly, and ran down the hall, burst out the door, and got the hell out of that hospital.
And ran over a nurse.
Meredith raced through the streets, panting.
Then her lack of physical fitness caught up to her, and she tripped into the dirt, outside a ramen booth.
She skid a few feet, then stopped.
Meredith lay there for a moment, then jumped up.
Her knees were skinned, and they hurt.
This was not a dream.
So she walked into the small shop next to her, lifting up the flaps.
Oooh, hot guy. Hot guy, hot guys everywhere!
Meredith plopped down next to a group.
There were twelve people, who all stared at her.
"Are you wearing a hospital gown?" A pink-haired-girl asked.
Meredith shot her a look. "Sorry, but I haven't got time for stupid questions, pinky. I need to figure out where I am and how the hell this is happening to me. Seems like just a weird dream."
The pinkette lay out a gasp of anger.
A blonde yelled at her. "Hey, don't talk to Sakura-chan like that!"
Meredith ignored him, speaking to the ramen guy.
"Hey, do you do tabs? I could pay you back soon, promise!"
The old man looked her over, and plopped a bowl of ramen on the counter.
"Thank you very much!"
Meredith broke apart some chopsticks, then took a second look. "Chopsticks? Dammit....no spoons?"
The old man gave her a strange look before placing a spoon on the counter.
"You rock old man!" Meredith smiled at him.
Then she ate that ramen as fast as she could without looking stupid.
After finishing, she stood up. "Thanks for the food, promise I'll pay you back, now I've gotta go celebrate my freedom!"
"What freedom?"
Meredith smiled her best smile at the brunette with the ponytail. "My parents were assholes, worst of the worst, and now they're either dead or missing. I'm celebrating the short/forever period of time when I won't have to fear for my life!"
Awkward silence.
Meredith leaned forward. "By the way, you little stud muffin, you're cute. Call me!"
Then she dashed out of the stand in her flimsy hospital gown, singing the Kim Possible theme song.
Ah, if only Meredith knew what would happen to her....
And how bitchy she would turn out to be...
And weak.....
And stupid....
"Hey!" Meredith screamed up at me. "Stop being biased, damn narrator! You're just supposed to narrate!"
A huge safe fell from the sky and almost hit Meredith.
"Watch it with the huge flying stuff, bitch!" Meredith screamed.
A cruise ship fell out of the sky.
Then an airplane,
And then a-
"STOP DAMMIT!"
Meredith slapped the narrator across the face.
Chitome, who was merely typing on her keyboard, glared at Meredith.
Then tackled her.
dfh oiehgiugh eohwg uowhgheiwjgiorejcioerjti3 t8903yt 4t3 tv h still typongsdhoa hfoh ohgohg
I'm so sorry about that, dear readers. A certain main character needed to be put in her place.
Meredith gurgled through the ropes that Chitome had tied her up in.
Don't worry, dear readers, Meredith is just being punished for breaking the fourth wall.
