ICE COLD HEART

Help me!!
I think I am going numb
With pain, heartbreaks and hurts I hide
I tell everyone I am getting better
But am I really better?
In those secret hidden places
Where no one ever sees me
The pain reaches out to tear me apart
The deception slows my heart beat
The betrayal bends me over
And the regrets overwhelm me
Till I am rolling and groaning
With hot tears streaming down my eyes
Wondering exactly what my fault was
In escaping from coldness and loving with my whole being
But love turned its back on me again
And I was back in the cold
In hatred and anger and pain
Blaming myself for refusing to learn
And for making myself love's victim again
I see him unconcerned and unbothered
About the pain he has caused me
And how I am left alone to heal
But I do not blame him
Its my heart I have to school
On how to be ice again

@tolarnee