chapter four

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Tears.

Tears were falling from my eyes, rolling down my cheeks in a continous pattern. The thing I hated most was crying. It made me feel so weak, lonely and depressed.

I was a hundred percent sure that I am sober. There's no way I could digest what happened in a drunken state. I sobbed, crying even more harder. I hugged my knees and cried even more.

"Madelaine?" I heard Leia's voice calling me out.

"No, just s-stay there d-don't come n-near." I instructed while struggling to get words out from my mouth.

"Hell no I ain't going nowhere lady. You're obviously crying babe, what happened??" Leia walked passed the window and sat beside me.

My head was still on my knees. I couldn't lift my head up. I couldn't bear anyone seeing my eyes.

"Nothing h-happened Leia. You c-can go and take care of our girls d-downstairs." I mumbled against the cloth on my knees.

"I am not going anywhere until you tell me what's going on." Leia's voice tensed up.

My heart started to beat even more faster. No, I won't let anyone see my eyes.

"Just go, okay!! Leave me alone! I'll come down later, I promise but now just leave me alone please..." I pleaded, my voice slowly creaked at the end.

"Fine, but if you don't come down by 10, I will not hesitate to drag you down from here." Leia pat my shoulder as a gesture of comfort and walked out of the window.

After I heard the door closed, my head slowly rises. My breath hitched as tears rolled down my cheeks, fading all the makeup that I'd put on.

My eyes.

All I ever wanted this while was to change the colour of my eyes.

All I ever wanted was to find my soulmate.

All I ever wanted was to know the real eye colour beneath this demony red blood coloured eye.

But, why is it that I don't feel the same way as I expected it to be?

Why, must it be now?

I let out my last breath and stood up, reaching out to my red heels I continued to walk past the window. Standing on the cold wooden floors of the room, I put on my red heels and stare at it. This was it. This was my eye colour.

Now, it's purple.

Madelaine, stop it! Don't you always wish for this to happen? Then, why aren't you happy now? Why aren't you accepting the fact that it happened?

I sighed, my subconscious does have a fair point. Why can't I accept it after wishing and wanting it to happen? Why did I have to cry it out?

Shaking my head, I proceed to the bathroom located at the right side of the room and rested my fingers on the doorknob.

Somehow, I need to see it for myself that this is real.

My fingers were twitching and I could feel myself hesitating to twist it open. Without thinking twice, I twist the doorknob open and closed it back once I'm in. Adrenaline rushed all over my body as I know the mirror that I am going to see was placed on my right.

I took a step forward. Then, a step to the right with my body facing the mirror. I kept my head low, staring at the cold tiles of the toilet. Slowly, I built the courage to lift my head up once and for all to look at myself in the mirror.

My breathing hitched, fastened, and I couldn't blink.

I stared at myself, well not quite. I stared at my eyes.

Taking a step forward, I leaned onto the sink, letting it hold all of my weight. I let out a defeated sigh, slowly my fingers were crawling up my face. Caressing up on the dried tears on my right cheek, my fingers finally reached my eyes.

No, I have to make sure that this is real. I need to.

I closed my eyes and caress my fingers on top of it. At this point, I don't even care if my eyeshadow is ruined but the fact that I want my eyes to turn back into it's normal red colour was the only thing I was hoping for once I open these eyes.

Dropping my fingers down, both of my arms were beside me. And the only remaining thing to do now is to raise my lids open and accept whatever I'm going to see. I let out a final breath and opened my eyes. Purple was all that I could see. There was not even a slight drop of red in my iris. Nodding my head, I told myself that this is the fate I have to accept no matter what.

I turned around and walked out of the bathroom. I was certainly not ready to face anyone with my eyes but there is just one question that kept on lingering in my head,

"Why did he run away?"

- - - - -

hello guys! So, finally I had publish a chapter after god knows how long.. sorry to those who had been waiting i just had tons of work for the past months and only now is the time i'm free to fully continue my writing. Anyways, hope you guys like this chapter! There isn't much that happened in this chap but at least there was something hehe. Don't forget to vote, comment, and share!

sincerely, a r i <3

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