I'm sorry I have not written a story in a while. It's been hard this summer. Ever since I've graduated, it's been hard.
Where do I start with this? Do want be to tell you the truth or lie to you guys? I'll lie first.
" I'm fine." " I'm doing great." " I love living here. You know, without him." " My life is going uphill more than it is downhill."
The truth.
My life is horrible. It's like I can't decide on what I want to do. I like this guy so much that it is driving me to the point of losing my insanity. I barely have any left. I don't know the guy personally but there's something about him that just seems so perfect to me. Now, I know what you are thinking," How can someone be perfect when everyone has a flaw?" Well, the flaw is something that people look down upon as a career. What is that career, you may ask. Well, it's YouTube. He's already said that YT is the right career path for him and I love that about him. He's very dedicated to his work and what he puts into it. Listen to me go on about this guy. I wish I could tell him how much I like him. I just don't know how much that would effect him. He probably has girlfriend anyways. Or at least likes someone. And if he doesn't then he isn't looking for a girlfriend. Especially one that is roughly 5-6 years younger than him. But why should age matter though? I just don't what to do. He's the first thought I think of when I wake up in the morning and the last thought I think of at night before I go to sleep. Do I have it bad because it feels like I do. It wouldn't be so bad if he was in the same state as I was and not 3 hours behind me. I really like him though and I'd be lost without his videos now. And his voice!! Gawd! I wish he was living me though. So I wouldn't feel so lonely at night. And have someone to tell my dreams to. That would be amazing. But maybe I'm only dreaming about something that will never ever happen in a lifetime. I don't know. Maybe one of you guys could help me out. That would be greatly appreciated.
