Author: onemorefanaccount
Song: Ex, James TW
Saturday night and the streets are filling up
Saturday night and my mates are calling up
Wondering where I've been, where I've been
If I'm ever coming out again, out again
Another week had just passed by and Ross could hear the city come to life. People of all ages were taking advantage of the weekend and many were partying before Monday morning rolled back over.
His phone had been blowing up with messages from his friends who were trying to lure him out to join them. They hadn't seen much of him these past few weeks, Ross had isolated himself recently-trying his best to deal with what had happened alone.
His friends were pushing him to join them, wanting him to hang out and get out of his thoughts for a night and have some fun.
Guess I don't see the harm in just a couple drinks
Guess I don't see the harm in having two or three
Probably do me good, do me good
'Cause I think of you more than I should, than I should
Sighing as he texted a reply, Ross finally got back to them and promised to meet them at the club. He figured there was no harm, he could join his friends for a few drinks and catch up with them all.
Getting out of the house was probably long overdue anyway. It would be good to see his friends, they can always bring a smile to his face.
Since the break up, Ross hadn't had much on his mind besides you. He knew it wasn't healthy to have you consuming his thoughts as much as you did, but he couldn't help it. It was the little things he remembered most. Your odd habits and your not-so-funny jokes, the way you twirled your hair when you were lost in thought and the way your eyes crinkled when you smiled.
You were on Ross' mind constantly. He never intended to let his mind wander to you so much, but somehow everything around him reminded him of you and everything was always somehow connected to you.
They think they're trying to help introducing me to someone else
I play along 'cause I haven't got the heart to tell 'em
That if I dance with somebody
I might want somebody else
Ross' friends had been introducing him to girls all night.
He understood their efforts came from the right place, they thought this was what he needed-what he wanted, Ross couldn't be mad at them for their attempts.
It wasn't their fault he couldn't give the girls the attention they deserved.
But Ross couldn't tell them the truth about how he felt or how what they were trying to do just wouldn't work-so he let them introduce him to girls and he entertained their comments and their ideas.
The truth was that he didn't go with any of these girls because his biggest fear was that he would want to...Ross worried he might actually find himself wanting to find someone, to be with them.
And if I want somebody
I might fall in love and forget what it was to be
Wrapped in your arms so tightly
To be your man so tonight I'll be
Dancing alone 'cause I'm afraid if I forget then you'll just become an Ex
If he ever found someone else...he would risk falling for them. He didn't want that.
Ross wasn't ready to let you go, to move on. He didn't want to forget what it was like being with you. How safe and loved and incredible it felt to be with you, all of that history and memories...he wasn't ready.
He figured he'll dance on his own, turn them all down so he didn't have to face his biggest fear.
The moment he moved on and let you go, the moment he forgot what it was like to be yours, to be loved and love in such a way-it would mean putting you in his past, acknowledging that you were just part of some relationship that never worked out.
Now I remember why this was a bad idea
Now I remember even less than when we got here
Memories, memories
I feel you slipping away from me, away from me
Hours had gone by and he could feel you were leaving his mind.
Drink after drink, dance after dance-it was as if you were fading from his thoughts and Ross didn't like that feeling at all-he wan't you to stay, he wanted you clouding his thoughts, he wanted you.
I almost wish they'd play the song we used to sing
I almost bought some other girl your favourite drink
Had to stop myself, stop myself
Had to drink the lemon drop myself, drop myself
Despite the dance floor being full of people, Ross felt alone. Nothing was the same without you, something was missing and nothing felt right.
Ross caught himself wishing for that song. Your song. He realised he probably shouldn't have been thinking of it...but so many great memories had been made to that song, it had a significant place in his heart and held so much meaning.
Ross had offered to get the next round for the table, including the girl he had been talking to.
It was an instinctual response to order your favourite drink, he never intended to do so-but by the time he realised, it was too late. Ross took the drink for himself and as he drank it he was hit with so many memories of you...
All the happy memories and the sad ones, all the times you made him so angry and all the times you made him so hopeful, all the laughs shared and the tears shed, the music and the art and the passion.
All the love.
They think they're trying to help introducing me to someone else
I play along 'cause I haven't got the heart to tell 'em
That if I dance with somebody
I might want somebody else
And if I want somebody
I might fall in love and forget what it was to be
Wrapped in your arms so tightly
To be your man so tonight I'll be
Dancing alone cause I'm afraid if I forget then you'll just become an Ex
