I Am Heartless (Completed)

happily ever after

Sanskar was sitting outside OT all broken
His love his life is inside fighting with death ….. This thought itself is so piercing his face drowned in tears ….. His eyes were tearing with each passing second but it was less than the pain he is feeling inside ….. His heart is bleeding ….. Drowning in his own guilt ….. Yes GUILT …. He was guilty …. He cursed himself badly for her state
Sanskar monologue – IT is all my fault, she is in this condition just because of me that .. That bullet was meant for me but … She took it ….. It was all my fault I was only adamant to go with her n now look what happened ….
His thoughts paused listening to loud sounds
He looks in front with the blur vision of his eyes only to find arjun shouting on doctors …..
He sighed …. He didn’t has any power left to calm arjun ….
He slowly moved towards the glass window ….. His Swara was lying there attached with many wires …. He closed his eyes tightly in pain with two heavy tears rolls down his cheek ….
‘She can’t leave me’
He whispers in a choked voice ….
Not able to stand on his knees anymore he slowly sat down taking support of wall
**
Ranjhan dhoondhan main chaleya
Ranjhan mileya naa ye…
Jigraan vichon agan laga ke Rabba
Laqeeran vich likh di judaai
**

He remembers him meeting with her when she was singing …. Her voice melodious … Still that song ringing in his ears

**
Kho gaya, gum ho gaya
Waqt se churaya tha jo
Apna banaya tha..
Ho tera, woh mera
Saath nibhaaya tha jo
Apna banaya tha..
**

He remembers all the time they both shared together … In classroom …. Her house …. The time when she fell on him …. The very first day he was able to feel her

**Chadariya jheeni re jheeni
Chadariya jheeni re jheeni
Aankhein bheeni ye bheeni ye bheeni
Yaadein jheeni re jheeni re jheeni
**

He getting to know about her being queen IT shocked him to core but still he didn’t cared about it because he already have her his heart his soul ….

**
Aisa bhi kya milna, saath hoke tanha
Aisi kyun sazaa humne hai paayi, Ranjhana ve
Phir se mujhe jeena, tujhpe hai marna
Phir se dil ne di hai ye duhaai, Saajnaa ve
Laqeeron pe likh di kyun judaai..**

He cries silently keeping his head down …. He never imagined to see Swara in this state …. All the silent promises he made to himself about saving Swara are lying broken today …..
Few more years found there way from his eyes as he remember her lying in pool of blood

**
Gair sa hua khud se bhi, na koi mera
Dard se karle chal yaari, dil ye keh raha
Kholun jo baahein, bas gham ye simat rahe hain
Aankhon ke aage lamhe ye kyun ghat rahe hain
Jaane kaise koi sehta Judaaiyaan.
**

His eyes turns red n fingers clenched in a tight fist as his mind starts to think about her baseless words she said to him few hours ago

Now I have to leave
Before leaving
Last time

**
Chadariya jheeni re jheeni
Chadariya jheeni re jheeni
Aankhein bheeni ye bheeni ye bheeni
Yaadein jheeni re jheeni re jheeni
**

He stood up immediately wiping his wet face with his hands
Sanskar determined – I can’t fall weak …. I know nothing will happen to Swara ….. She will be alright …. She have to be

He stood there gazing at the red light ….
After about an hour finally it went off
As soon as doctor appears sanjun ran to him
Sanskar – how is Swara
Arjun – she is alright na
Both were in there panic mode ….
Doc – calm down both of you
Sanskar glared him with blood shot eyes
Arjun angrily – do hell with your calm down just tell me how is Swara
Doctor gets afraid seeing there angry faces ….. He gulps
Doc – we have taken out the bullet from her back but …… He stammers
Sanskar – but what
Doc – we will be able to tell exactly about her condition when she gets conscious
Saying this he left from there hurridly
Arjun bangs his hand on side wall
Arjun – blo*dy doctor
Sanskar calmly – relax arjun she will be fine …..
Arjun looks at him then nods his head
Sanskar sighed n moves inside her ward
His legs froze looking at her tired pale face ….. She was not deserving this …. She damn deserves happiness not this pain …….. He walks slowly towards her n sits beside her on stool
He lovingly caress her hair before planting a soft kiss full of love on her forehead
He remember her confession ….. Those magical words he waited to hear from so long ….. He wanted her to confess her love but obviously not like this …..
He smiled sadly and roof her tight hand between his palms ….
Sanskar – Swara please wakeup it is hurting me seeing you like this ….. We have out full life ahead …. Our love story didn’t even start ….. You have me hope, confessed your feelings then How can you leave me in middle n go ….. No no you are alright you are just punishing me for irritating you na but I promise I will never do anything which you don’t like but please open your eyes Swara ….. Please …… His voice choked ….. Breathing became heavy …… Many unwanted tears flowed from his eyes blurring his vision
It’s breaking him ….. His heart
Seeing his love his Swara like this …..
Guilt again filled his heart n mind when his eyes fell on the bandage across her left shoulder …..
He moved his hands a little to caress it but the stops in middle closing his eyes letting few tears found there way again from his eyes
Couldn’t able to handle more of this unbearable pain he ran from there
He left the ward as fast as he can without even turning back
Without even looking at her for once
He can’t handle his emotions anymore
Finally he stops in some lonely corridor
Falling on his knees he cried his heart out ….. His loud cries filled the empty path with sadness
Don’t know till how much time he sat there crying
Letting his pain flow in form of tears
His trance was broken by call
He takes out his mobile from pant pocket
Cursing the caller in his mind
He blinks his eyes several time to make his vision clear
But his eyes free wide seeing the caller id
He immediately got up wiping his tears before attending the call
Sanskar – arjun is everything alright …. Do you need something …. Is swara well …. Did she get conscious
He shoots question one after the other not even giving chance to the person to speak
With Our getting response he ask again ……. His heart was beating faster …..
Sanskar – speak up something arjun