I said something awful. And i said it to make you angry with me so you would leave me alone. But i didn't know how much i would miss you. But i can never tell you how i feel after not having you there anymore. Because people will think im stupid and even i still don't know how if it was even more than a joke.
I wish i could tell you how much i do enjoy talking to you and how nice you are to me.
I wish i could tell you how much i hated that i was falling for you but i just kept lying to everyone. I even lied to myself.
I wish you weren't such a joke.
I wish that if i had a relationship with you that i would know that it Was just a bet like Jamie was.
I wish that i didnt say what i did. I told you something that was partly truthful because i am scared but i shouldn't have said it. Especially the way that i did.
I wish i could express how sorry i am. But the damage is done now.
I wish that you knew how much it meant to me to have you there to tell me how beautiful i was. You even told me how beautiful i was on the inside. I guess you take that back now. Well now you see my true colors.
I wish you knew how much it meant to me when you were there for me when james and i broke up.
I know it was a joke to start with but then we started falling for each other and playing along was my downfall. As much as i wanted you to leave me alone i wanted the opposite.
I told you about dane and told you how much i like him but i really like you. I just wish you were thr nice boy he is. And i bragged about dating james, that was to make you jealous. He was too far away to think long term. I wanted you anf i still do. And i cant believe that i was that mean to you. And i know how unlikely it is that you will talk to me, let alone date me after what i have done. But now i am torn.
People kept telling me it was a joke but i didn't believe them i should have trusted my gut. But its over now and if you ever read this i have been thinking about you every second we haven't spoken. I love you and i am sorry.
Love Rose.
YOU ARE READING
Dearest Reader
Historia CortaLove, sadness, heart break this book is just for pretty much everything. Tale of a girl called rose and her life. This is her diary. Every page is dedicated to a different person and sometimes its the quiet girls that have the most interesting lives.
