Cigarettes . JeromeASF a.u.

Hate blog - 3

When I woke up it was 5 pm and Zoey was in the guest bedroom giggling, smoke was coming out of it so I was very confused and my head hurt. I opened the door and Zoey was laying on the ground giggling, I sighed. ''I thought you said you were gonna stop smoking.'' I said with a sigh, ''It's just I saw you and I wanted to remember how it felt.'' She said through a giggle. You see when I first met Zoey her parents had just passed away in a car crush, she was a 16 year old foster kid and she was very sad.

She had been diagnosed with depression and anxiety so after getting to know her she told me how she loves cigarettes and steals them from her foster mom all the time, I didn't exactly find that funny but for some reason she did. One day she showed up at my door high out of her mind and we just laid in my backyard and talked, it was 4 am. She told me how she got high with some other foster kids and how they said they'd be her suppliers. She told me how good she felt, that since she's gotten high everyday and is no longer depressed. She even stopped crying herself to sleep but eventually it became a problem, I'd go to call her to talk too her about something important and the next morning when I'd mention it she'd say ''Sorry I was so high last night, I can't remember a thing''. I told her that if she didn't cut back then I'd send her to rehab and so she cut back, her anxiety started acting up again and suddenly she was smoking two packs of cigarettes a day.

She called me at 2 am everynight crying and one night, she had a panick attack on the phone and it was really bad. She told me she was sorry but she couldn't do this and then the next day she told me she got high as a kite. She told me as much as she needed me , she couldn't deal with everything without having some  help... 

So yeah I've known Zoey since we were sixteen and she has a pretty fucked up past but hey, I love her.