It was just my luck that I decided to get on the smelliest taxi in all of France. Ever smelled cat pee?
No?
Well, I recommend this taxi for your learning experience.
Thankfully, the driver spoke some English and was helping me find Joshua. I had sprinted straight out of the hotel doors when Johnny had informed me that Joshua wanted to play hooky. I hadn't even bothered to ask for Johnny's help, because I knew the butthole would only laugh at me or even worse: decide to come with me.
We had been driving around in circles for the past twenty minutes and I was getting more impatient and frustrated with every passing minute.
"Take a right here? Er, how about a left?" I continued to point out several more scattered directions.
Finally, I spotted a string of people with large cameras, all huddling close to a building's entrance.
Aha! Paparazzi.
Sprinting out of the cab, we only had half an hour left, I paid the taxi driver and said goodbye.
I read the sign that had been painted towards the top of the brick building.
Davy's
Huffing, I pushed my way through the large crowd of photographers. I even elbowed a few for fun. My entrance was blocked by a hand on my forehead before I had even gotten the chance to pull one of the large wooden doors open. The hand belonged to a gigantic ogre of a guy.
Jesus, just my luck to have to get past that.
I put on my best poker face and sternly spoke, "Excuse me, uh, sir. First of all, do you speak English?"
I got nothing but a cold stare. The guy didn't even remove his meaty hand from my forehead. Talk about a disrespect of personal space.
The idea came to me in a flash, and I whipped out my phone because of it. It took me a couple of seconds to download the translate app, but I finally got what I wanted to say.
" Vous cherchez Joshua?" I asked in butchered French.
"Joshua is friend. You cannot see him. You bad paparazzi"
So the ogre spoke English!
Damn, it didn't look like he was inclined to give me what I wanted. I was determined to get Joshua to that shoot. Obstacles be damned.
"You see, I'm not a paparazzi! How dare you insult me by lumping me with those scumbags?" The paparazzo's uproar behind me helped my case pretty well.
Too bad the ogre wasn't buying it at all. So I did what any stressed out manager could do.
I yelled spider at the top of my lungs.
I was impressed with myself when the Ogre jumped up in surprised hurry.
A guy like that had to be a wuss about something as measly as a spider, I thought cynically.
I took that as my chance and scurried inside of the building. I could hear the ogre's large steps trailing behind me. His voice carried throughout the entire place, but I kept on running. Almost colliding with a large brunette who was carrying drinks, I turned a sharp corner.
I realized this was a bar at the same moment that I caught sight of Joshua. Seeing as a crowd of women were drinking shots off of his chest.
What. A. Man. Slut.
"Hey, popstar!" Joshua yelled to me over the crowd of people.
Popstar? Oh right. I had almost forgotten about my 'Rock Your Body' rendition from earlier.
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Sugar Babe [Completed]
JugendliteraturEver had Ramen Noodles for an entire month? Lilly Fenster has and she's tired of it. Which is why she ends up managing the fashion industry's hottest Brazilian model. Lucky her, right? Not really. Lilly can't stand the intolerable Joshua Lachowski...