If Love Is Blind

three

I BELIEVE SHE PLANNED her day with her hopes hopping on clouds while her body tried to catch up with that restless soul she owned. I do not think that she actually knew how this apparent playdate was going to work out, for she planned to do things with him that he wouldn't enjoy considering he could not perceive the world like we did. I tried to sit down with her, to explain and prepare her for what was to come, but she did not see things the way I did. She kept telling me, eventually with a tired sound to her voice that "Kaden was just like any other boy out there". 

Before she left the house, foolishly wearing her best clothes, a sense of longing came before me, trapping me whole while it whispered memories of the little girl my Claret used to be. She was getting noticed, now, and she was no longer only mine. I would have to share her affection, which to me sounded unfair. After all, my cozy love was all she had ever known. I tried to ignore it and I tried to lock all of those thoughts into the Cabinet of Remembrance I kept in my mind. But I could not look at her and not get chills prior to brimming tears when I thought of how she was growing up before my eyes, and I could not do anything about it. 

"I'll see you for supper, Grandpa," she said as she was leaving.

I smiled. "You have fun, Dear. Take care."

WHEN SHE CAME BACK, I would learn all of the things she had done. Claret did not spare any details, and I was glad to have such an expressive daughter, hence I knew every second of her life she did not spend next to me. 

I learned that Kaden was not easy to crack, but deep inside, he was a gentleman with a warm heart and a strong mind, very intelligent so. When his mother introduced my Claret to him, he had not said anything until Lissa left the room.

"Are they paying you to come here?" he asked Claret.

Claret hesitated and felt as though his heart would break to know that he was hiring friends. She, though, could not lie. It was something about her that I admired yet found laughable. Claret could not tell a convincing lie if her life depended on it. She would get this tick on her right eye, start balancing on the tips of her toes while her arms awkwardly intertwined on her back, and her voice would shake with promised tears of guilt and regret.

So she did what she could do. She told him the truth. "Three pounds."

Kaden sighed. "Well, then I better get the best of your services. I'm Kaden, but you know that. And I know your name, too. So I guess we are no longer strangers."

Claret smiled and rolled her eyes, knowing that he did not see that and would not be offended. She instantly knew that he did not understand much of what real friends were.

Kaden seemed to intimidate my Claret at first. She did not understand me when I begged to differ when she said he was "just like any other boy". He was a year older than her, sixteen, and was in a thundering need for sunlight to drop over his very pale skin, as she had said. He wore sunglasses over his eyes, with pitch black, slightly wavy hair that drooped over his forehead. He had been wearing a dress shirt and khaki pants 

"We are strangers," she assured, "So let's not be."

"How are we going to do that?" he asked.

My Claret sat down like an indian before him on the floor. She smiled when she sighed, knowing it was going to be a long day that day. 

"Well," she said, thinking about asking something that had nothing to do with sight, "What's your favorite sound?"

Kaden huffed. "This is stupid. You didn't ask me my favorite color because you thought I might never see color again."

Claret knodded, later realizing he couldn't see that. "Yeah, I did. So?"

Kaden shiften in his place. "Well, just so you know, I do have a favorite color."

Claret, with confusion laid on her face, stared while she waited for an answer. She knew he had become blind, and to have a favorite color was something she found interest upon. He missed his sight, like would any person who became blind

"Green," he jumped suddenly, "Green is my favorite color."

Claret knitted her bushy eyebrows and tilted her head slightly to the left, hoping to get more insight, but she didn't.

"Why is that?" She asked.

Kaden, once again, huffed. He seemed to do that a lot. "Because it's pretty. Why else would you like a color?"

Claret smiled. "Because it reminds you of something," she said, "Because it gives you a feeling."

Kaden sat awkwardly an gulped, tightening his grip around his cane. "Well, what is your favorite color?"

Claret then thought back to what reminded her of home. To know this warms my heart and it pains every muscle in my body to say, but she answered, "Blue, the color of my grandpa's eyes."

Kaden at that moment realized that Claret was, indeed, interested in making a friend. She was not only here because she needed the money, but she was actually interested in making him feel less lonely. That made him realize just how lonely he was, and just how much he had let his disability consume him. After all, Claret had been nothing but nice to him all this time, yet he let his egotistical view on life get the best of him. He was not like this before his accident; he was a gentleman. Perhaps he thought he should do that again to fill in the void left after his sight left him. 

A few moments had passed. He gulped. "My, my favorite color," he stuttered, "It's not green. It's orange, like the sunsets. It's the one I can remember the most because - because that was the last color I saw before -".

Claret understood, and therefore did not press further. Her smile slowly crept back into her lips, thinking about all the things that he must have enjoyed when he could see this world. In some way, Claret envied him. He did not have to see just how ugly the world is now. In some other way, Claret was almost happy he was blind right here, right now. He did not have to see her uncomely face and could just listen to her mind. 

A sudden thought popped into her head. "Do you dream?"

Kaden gulped. "Yes."

"What do you dream about?"

He thought for a considerable amount of time, and Claret patiently waited for the response. She understood this was something new to him, and Claret was patient when she wanted to be. 

"Soccer, sunsets, the beach, books," he stopped, "My mom."

Upon hearing this, a strong poignancy overcame her body. So he liked the outside, she thought, he liked sports and beaches and staring into sunsets with radiant colors. He missed looking at his mother. 

Kaden then said, "You seem like an interesting girl," he started, "I like you.

Claret, with all this in mind, came to understand Kaden Khan. He lacked a sense, but he made sense of everything else around him. She was glad she could finally have someone understand her and not see her. He could not see her flaws, which she had many of. She could be herself, even if that meant people would stare awkwardly. But that was okay, because he was not biased that way.

They spent the rest of the day like that, just talking about everything. It was all that was important to them and all that seemed useless to us adults. We would not comprehend, and that is probably why she didn't say much of the rest to me. Maybe she did not trust us with things she knew we would not understand. 

I am glad I enjoyed every part of these encounters. I am glad I was there through every second when she first fell in love.