*Guinea dog 2

I wanted a dog.I got a guinea pig instead.At first I was devastated. How could my mom think a guinea pig could replace a dog? I knew she was just trying to be nice but still...

   Mom knew I was crused that my dad wouldnt  me have a dog. The guy doesnt like dogs.Is that nuts or what?He has a long list of reasons why he'll never let me have one.I have a long list of reasons why I want one.But his reasons always win.Why?Because he's the dad. He works at home.He gets to make the call.He's the umpire and the dog is always out.

    So mom brought home a guinea pig and guess what? Dad didnt like it either. What does the guy like?Quiet.Order.Perfect grammar.

    The guy's as much fun as a standardized test. He insisted we bring"the infernal creature"back to the pet shop but when we did it had closed up and disappeared for good.

   So instead of a dog I got stuck with a guinea pig.I named her fido the name I'd been saving for the dog I'd been wabting all my life and tragically would never get.

   But as it turned out Fido is no ordinary guinea pig.She does a lot of strange things.

.She growls

. She howls

. She whines

. She pants

. She barks

. She yaps when someone is at the door

. She sanrls at the mail carrier

. She bites the mail carrier

. She obeys commands such as sit/heels/speaks and rolls over when I tell her to

. She licks her self

. she licks my face

. she licks my face after she licks herself

. she eats dog food

.she begs for table food

. she eats meat

. she eats cheese

. she eats pie

. she eats poop

. she eats dead things

. her breath smells like meat, cheese, pie, dead things, and poop.

. she runs up to me when I come home from school

. she chews up my homework

. she chews up my dads shoes

. she chews bones

. she buries bones

. she buries dads shoes

. she sleeps at the end of my foot bed

. she dreams that shes running her little paws wave in the air

. she snores

. she walks on the leash exc.

in other words she acts like a dog. she isnt a dog though. shes a fat orange guinea pig with a white mohog. My best friend Murphy cause her again the dog. After fight a rescue me from the river and take care of me and kept me company while I got better I stopped minding that she wasn't an actual dog. I didn't care that she wasn't any dog. She was my Guinea dog and I wouldn't trade it for anything. then my football better and I was forced to go back to school.