One Direction One Shots :)

Not Your Fault

(A/N)

This one is for @Devonni.. Thank you for making me use my brain for this one, because it took me ages to think of something. It's a serious one.

*Inspired by Not Your Fault by Awolnation*

~~~~

I love Niall. I really do.

I mean, who didn't?

He's Niall freaking Horan.

But, I was just the lucky girl who was able to say that Niall was hers.

And that he never let me forget it.

I was over at his flat today, seeing as I had stayed the night. It got late, Niall didn't want me to drive home alone, so he convinced me to stay.  

We were just talking, and I decided to check my Twitter on his laptop. I hadn't been on it in ages, for some reason.

The first thing I noticed was the amount of mentions I had. Niall and I had been dating for almost a month now, and I had never had so many mentions. Ever.  Becoming quite confused, I checked them, slowly scrolling through, reading whichever ones caught my eyes. Apparently, someone had found a really old picture of me, from when I was in high school. I think the picture was from ninth grade, but it was years ago, and I didn't have the best of memories. All I knew for a fact was that this was the picture I hated the most of myself. I looked like a sloppy mess, my braces, which seemed way to big for my mouth, were practically jutting out. My hair wasn't done, and I looked like I was high, when really, I was overly tired. I don't remember who took the picture, why it was taken, or anything about that day. All I know is it took me forever to get over it. 

And now it was back to haunt me.

"What's wrong love?" Niall asked me, coming out of the kitchen and seeing the look on my face.

"Nothing," I whispered, still looking at the picture.

He came and sat beside me. I quickly shut the laptop. "Jei, what's going on?"

"I said nothing, Niall! Leave it alone!"

Oh no. 

No, no, no, no, no. This isn't happening. It's not going to happen. 

I had managed to hide it the whole time, from media, fans, and Niall. I wasn't going to lose control. It was just a stupid picture. Think straight, Jeida, I told myself. Niall doesn't need to know. 

"Just tell me, Princess. It's okay.."

"NO Niall. Nothing is okay!" I was starting to tear up. "And I'm not your princess. I'm far from it. Just look!" I opened the laptop again to show him the picture. "I'm hideous, and disgusting, and--"

He cut me off, placing a gentle kiss on my lips.

"I don't care how you look. To me, you'll always be beautiful, no matter what. It's what's on the inside that counts."

"But, that's the thing, Niall," I said. "You don't know what's inside me."

"Then tell me."

And that's exactly what I did. I told him everything. About my bipolar disorder, and how I struggled for years. I told him about how whenever I was with him, I managed to keep it in line. About how I would cry my self to sleep at night, about the tortue I would get at school. I told him about my self-esteem issues, and how I nearly starved myself to death. I spilled my heart to him, not leaving a single thing inside.

When I was done, he held on to me tight as I cried.

"None of what you just said chages how I feel about you," he said, kissing my forehead. "I love you, no matter what your past is like."

I smiled, and said into his chest, "I love you, too."

"Oh, and Jei?" I looked up, aknowledging him.

"It's not your fault. You will always be my Princess."