Ask Fugaku

Dance time, bitch

Fugaku's pov

I stared down at the glowing brick in my hand, the thing they call a phone. The Lonely One had made a really bomb ass request. Now all I had to do was find Hollow and make that shit happen. I also needed a good place, somewhere all these hoes would see me. The center of town seemed like the most crowded place, and therefore the most logical. I was fucking ready to do this shit. I needed a song too. I was thinking uptown funk, but the decision still wasn't final. I still needed some time to plan this par-tay-tay. 

"Where oh where could my gay-haired child be." I hummed to myself, drifting down the street. It was looking like the center of town was going to be the best place for me to show the world how poppin' I am. I can finally show them my rad dance moves, which is honestly all I've ever wanted in my after-life. They're all gonna see how changed I am. I ain't no bitch anymore. That coup shit I pulled was a hella low blow. I'm so glad Itachi came and murdered our asses. Saved me from an awkward conversation after we were busted for our crimes. That and it turned me into a literal badass. 

I saw a flash of rainbow and took off down the street, yodeling as loudly as I could when I spotted her. "Target sighted." I said to myself in a robotic voice. "F-Fugaku-s-san!" Hollow stuttered as I spun around her, landing in a dandy slide. "Ayeeee." I did finger guns at her. She glanced around. "W-What is it?" She stuttered quietly. I stood up straighter. "I need you to make me visible in front of everyone." I told her seriously. She looked frightened, which doesn't make sense because I didn't tell her to fight a hoard of rhinos or anything. "B-But-" I cut her off. "Shhh, child. Do it in an alley way so nobody sees, and I'll scoot my patoot right into the crowd." I told her. She stared at me, looking lost. I snapped my fingers. "Snazzy."

"...O-Okay..." She murmured. "Great!" I lifted her up above my head, screeching as I took off towards the closest alley. She squealed, looking for something to grab so she could steady herself, even though she knew I wouldn't drop her. "Fuck yeah, fuck yeah, fuck yeah." I muttered as I slid into the alley way the all the smoothness of a baby's behind. "Do it." I told her seriously. "U-Uh..." She gently poked my side. I sprung to life. "It's alive!" I cried. "W-Well actually-" I cut her off. "Shh, child. You understand not of what I speak." I told her in a hushed tone. She just stared with wide, confused eyes. I squealed a bit. She's so cute.

"Watch me dazzle the crowd with my impeccable charm." I winked in an over-dramatic sort of way, diving out of the alley. People screamed as I fell to the ground, rolling across it. People stumbled and fell as they struggled to jump over me in time. I cackled, jumping up. "Behold!" I boomed, holding up my phone. People gaped as I pressed the play button. In an instant, my jam began to play. 

"This hit, that ice cold Michelle Pfeiffer, that white gold." I struck a pose. "Isn't that Fugaku Uchiha?" Someone asked. "I-I think so." Someone stuttered. Hollow had made her way to the front of the crowd, and was staring. I pulled her forward. "I'm too hot!" I sung. "Hot damn." I jutted out my hip, picking her up. She squeaked, covering her eyes. I laughed. "Come on, Hollow! Let the clansies in!" I urged, throwing her in the air. Screaming, her chakra shout out like a pulse, covering the square. My clan mates and Hashirama popped up, dancing.

"I'm to hot!" I boomed. "Hot damn!" They all chorused, all doing the same dance at the same time, making it look like a flash mob. Hashirama moon walked over through the mass of panicked and confused people. "Request?" He asked. I laughed. "Fuck yeah!" I spun around, doing the shuffle. Hollow stared up at Hashirama and I with wide eyes. "Stop!" I shouted. The music and everyone else froze. "Fill my cup put some liquor in it!" Everyone whooped, and the music started again. Hashirama began to do some hip hop shit, and I obviously joined in. 

I cackled.

Fuck yeah.