Jungkook was sitting outside the school, sitting on a curb and leaning over a journal, writing. Occasionally, he would look up at the other students, who were waiting for their rides or just killing time. He would look at them and see how caught up they were in conversation, in groups of people like them, while he was alone, Yoongi busy.
He was sad, but he didn't know why. Most of the time when he's sad he has no idea what causes the emotion. So he writes.
Most times I find myself trapped between what I want to be doing and what would be better in the long run, for others, for myself. I am trapped in an everlasting dispute between two parts of myself, one that is positive, strong and outgoing, doing things for the feeling of content they give, the other a brick wall. The other part of me doubts. It doubts my intentions, my goals, my thoughts. It tells me I am not who others see me as, that Iam nothing. Which leads me to a question I've always had. Who am I? What am I but an obsolete organism of consciousness, never really knowing anything. Am I really kind like I want to be? Am I really as smart at Iwant to be? The answer is no. It's always no. Because outside of their dispute, the two parts of my mind agree on one thing:I will never be enough. I will be but an empty void, chasing after who I want to see in the mirror for as long as I live, thinking thoughts like, "I'll never be enough," And "I can do just a little bit better." The truth is thatI am always less than I seem. I will alwaysbeless than what I dreamof being.
Jungkook finishes writing, sighing when he hears a high pitched giggle from behind him. Park Jimin.
He told himself not to look, but finds himself turning around to see the older boy surrounded by friends, having the time of his life.
"His giggle is annoying," Jungkook mutters to himself although he blushes the next time Jimin lets out a laugh.
"Who's giggle is annoying?" A voice behind him asks. He turns around to see that it is Taehyung who's talking, Yoongi standing next to him.
He opened his mouth to respond when he finally notices what the pair is wearing. "Uhh.." He trails off, eyebrows raised in a question.
Yoongi notices his stare. "Oh yeah. Our outfits." He coughs. "I tried asking Hoseok to the dance. Turns out Taehyung was doing the same."
Jungkook laughs, curling in on himself when Taehyung adds on to the story, saying that they got rejected.
"He said he would see us around, though. We got in," Taehyung says, holding his hand out, palm up. Yoongi high fives him.
At this point Jungkook is in tears.
"What are we laughing about?"
Jungkook perks up at the voice, which belonged to a certain fluffy haired male, but doesn't stop laughing.
"Jungkook is making fun of the fact we got rejected by Hoseok," Taehyung says, pouting.
"I told you this would happen," Jimin says, punching Taehyung in the arm. "Wait, you too Yoongi?"
Yoongi nods, then goes back to glaring at the still laughing ball on the ground. Jimin lowers his gaze to him as well, smiling at how cutely the younger is giggling.
"Speaking of the dance, who are you going with, Jimin?" Yoongi asks when Jungkook stops wheezing, brushing himself off as he gets up to stand with his friend.
"I don't know," Jimin says, feigning normalcy when inside he's nervous as fuck. Ask Jungkook out, fucker. Come on.
"Who are you going with, Jungkook?" Taehyung asks, beating Jimin to the punch.
Jungkook shrugs, appearing bored. "No one."
"Well, since neither you or Jimin have plans maybe you could go with--"
"JIMIN OPPA!" a voice screeches from across the parking lot. "GO OUT WITH ME!" Along with the voice comes various other yells in agreement.
The four guys look over to the source, finding a group of girls staring back at them. The one who yelled appears to be blushing.
One of the boys is uninterested, another amused, the other embarrassed, and the final angry. His expression turns into sadness.
Jungkook breaks the silence. "You should attend to your fans, Jimin," he mutters, walking away quickly. Yoongi follows him, waving goodbye to Taehyung and Jimin.
Jimin knows Jungkook's remark was made of anger, but he can't help by look past that at the moment, noticing instead that that was the first time the younger has said a full sentence to him.
Taehyung looks at Jimin, mouth wide open. Why the hell is he blushing? Taehyung, confused yet amused, starts to say something but is interrupted by said blushing boy.
"I like the way he said my name. It's adorable," Jimin blurts out, blushing still, a small smile gracing his features.
Jungkook is such an emo poet lmao. That girlscreaming for Jimin is low-key me. Thanks for 200+ reads!!! I really appreciate it, especially with these shorter chapters. ♡♡♡ -katie
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