UGH

1.)

Play skinny love cover by Ed sheeran when it says too play the song please and thanks 😘

Troyes POV

"No Tyler I'm perfectly fine saying I'm upset is like trying to say bubble angrily." lies,I lied right to Tyler over the computer screen,I was breaking inside I had 99 problems and my Rug wasn't one of them I missed Tyler so much It hurt I got hate on all my social media websites and I held it all in for so long it started to bother me,and now I can't stop it all from bothering me now don't get me wrong there are positive things in my life and it could be worst but my mind likes to focus on the negative and not the positive,and I tended to take it out on myself.

*de next morning*

Today had been a particularly good day I hadn't thought of him haven't seen any hate and I was about to film a new video I was singing skinny love for Tyler but he didn't know this and he probably never would.

Starts filming

Skinny love : when two people love each other but are too shy to admit but they still show it,or in my case me loving him...

And then I started sing I love this song I listened to it when I was Sad .and when I was happy I love it, so I lost myself the lyrics...

*Play song *

Come on skinny love just last the year

Pour a little salt we were never here

My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my

Staring at the sink of blood and crushed veneer

I tell my love to wreck it all

Cut out all the ropes and let me fall

My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my

Right in the moment this order's tall

And I told you to be patient

And told you to be fine

And I told you to be balanced

And I told you to be kind

In the morning I'll be with you

But it will be a different "kind"

I'll be holding all the tickets

And you'll be owning all the fines

Come on skinny love what happened here

Suckle on the hope in lite brassiere

My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my

Sullen load is full; so slow on the split

And I told you to be patient

And I told you to be fine

And I told you to be balanced

And I told you to be kind

And now all your love is wasted?

And then who the hell was I?

And now I'm breaking at the britches

And at the end of all your lines

Who will love you?

Who will fight?

Who will fall far behind?

As I finished the song I got a Skype from the one and only Tyler-fine butt-Oakley.I ran to the other side of the room and answered and told him I had to finished my video so I quickly said the name and who the song was by and I did my usual outro and turned off the camera then casually walked back over to my computer.

"Hey Tilly!" I said I'm my usual perky voice "Hey Troyeeee " he said dragging the E in my name. "yes boo?" I asked "I can't sleep and I have a bunch of meetings tomorrow I was wondering if you could sing me to sleep with your angel voice?" Me and Tyler did this a lot I sung and he fell a sleep to my voice I'm not sure why he can stand it but he dose tonight I decided to sing give me love by Ed sheeran ,dark paradise by Lana del ray and nightingale by Demi. he always seems too fall asleep in the middle of the song I think it's adorable. I wish he would like me back...

*Later in de night*

(It kills me to write the hate)

"Why are you so fat you look like an elephant ".. I haven't eaten anything but a salad in three days..

"You so skinny eat some meat damn boy you ain't getting no action like that" but everyone thinks I'm fat..

"Please don't listen to them your perfect and beautiful" haha lies

"Can u not post your stupid videos and Tyler dosent like you so stop trying why don't you just die" maybe I should.

"Troye I love you we all love you fuck the haters,haters back off." I wish they would

"Look none of your friends love you not Zoe not Tyler not Connor not anyone so just stop trying and hide in your room till you get fat so you don't look like you haven't has an eating disorder sense you were five" that's it

One cut

Two cuts deep

Three curs deeper

Four even more deep

Five deepest

I watched as the blood went down the drain at the time it didn't hurt but now that I was cleaning them my thighs burned but I was used to it.I wish I wasn't but I am.

After I got out of the shower I wrapped my cuts in bandage and pulled on a pair if sweat pants and a sweater then like usual I weighed myself 119 still fat as fuck,nothing but toast for the nest couple of weeks I guess. I need sleep...

De next day

I can't believe what I just did I told Zoe I would go to a YouTube cruse with her Alfie ,Louise ,Tyler,Ben,Jack,Jack ,Jack ,Finn,Louis,dan,Phil,O2L,Jenn,Andrea,Andrew,Anthony,Bribry,Emma,Luke,patty,Jason,Casper,gabby,Marcus,Niomi ,Damon,matt,nick,Glozell,grace,hannah,Lilly,Jenna,Jim,Kingsley,mamrie.

It's going to be crazy my anxiety doesn't help at all.

Aprently we rented four different houses they were quite big in my house there were 5 bedrooms 6 bathrooms a living space dining space basement and kitchen now to check who's rooming

Room1: Alfie Zoe

Yay

Room2:Damon Jason

Pretty cool guys

Room3:Patty Luke

I love patty

Room 4: me tyler

Just fucking great

Room 5:Ben J pierce and jack dodge

Love those dudes

Well looks like I'm in for a interesting vacation...

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Hey first troyler fanfic give it some love 💗

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Kik (incase you need to talk):rosie0321