Haze **ON HOLD**

2

 I wish I was home.

There I could have grown up with my family that loved me, maybe gone to college and started a family of my own. Instead because of my choices, I was here watching Jamie mop up blood in Lucifer's office.

Lucifer leant back in his seat, smoking a cigar slowly as he watched Jamie with a cold stare before speaking up, "Jamie I have a question," He paused for a moment while he waited for Jamie to look at him after saying this. "Do you like being alive?" His voice was so calm despite what he was saying.

Jamie, who was fifteen, stopped what he was doing and looked across the room at Lucifer. Fear showed in his face as he held the mop in with both hands in front of him, "Y-Yes... I do sir. Please-"

Lucifer put a hand up for him to stop talking. He looked to the side at the photo of the former Phoenix mayor that he kept hung up on the wall as his own sense of mockery. "You know I often wonder... is it worth it?" He turned his face back to Jamie before his eyes latched onto me as well, sucking me into the cold void of his stare. "I've spent all the years of my life to be at this moment. To be in control. Now I'm here and I see life for what it really is: disappointing."

He exhaled a plume of smoke out of his mouth and nose before standing up, crushing the cigar in the glass ashtray on his desk before fixing his suit jacket while he walked over to Jamie. As he stood in front of him he stretched out his strong tattooed hand to pat him on the shoulder. He leaned in close to his ear. his silver teeth glinting in the light as he whispered in the boy's ear. "Save yourself the disappointment kid." With those last words he walked out of the office leaving just the two of us.

Jamie was clearly shaken, white knuckling the mop. I eventually stood up and walked to him, putting one hand on his shoulder and tipping his face up to look at me. "Calm down, he's not gonna do anything. I mean, he needs someone to clean up right?" I laughed a little before realizing my attempt at humor had failed just by the look on his face.

"Sorry sorry, finish up here and we can go grab something to eat downstairs yeah?" I didn't get an answer from him so I just assumed a yes, "Aight just come get me when you're done, I'll be in my room." I then ruffled his hair before walking out of the room.

While I waited for him, I sat in my room on my bed staring at the phone the agent gave me months ago. He'd told me only to use it when receiving a call from him once a week at night, but right now I couldn't deny the fact I wanted to call him and tell him I was out. Tell him I was too scared to go against Lucifer and put myself in harms way for what? The good of this city?

But if I did back out, that meant the FBI would continue with their mission to save the city without me, and my immunity would no longer be waiting for me when I got out of the city. A life behind bars was not something I wanted, nor something I could could live with. What would I tell Brina?

Brina was my girlfriend of nearly ten years. I'd been with her so long I couldn't imagine life without her, another reason I was pushing for this deal with the feds. She knew of course, she was the only person in the world I trusted with this information. When I first told her she told me she loved me and would follow this through with me.