Unrepentant

00

"Michael, why did you push the girl away?" My therapist, Janet, asked me, before glancing down at her sky blue notepad.

Her red hair was in a high bun, and her green eyes pierced into my icy blue ones.

"I had to. I wasn't good for her, and she wasn't good for me." I sighed out of boredom, before gliding my fingertips on the couch I was sitting on. My eyes began to wander around the room before my attention stayed on the olive colored curtains.

Twice a week I'd be in her office. My mom thought that since I had "problems" in school and I got into fights at least once a week, coming to therapy would help. I've been coming to therapy since I was fourteen, I'm seventeen now, and my habits haven't changed. This clearly isn't helping.

"Hmm," Janet hummed as she stood up to pour herself a second cup of coffee. "Care to tell me her name?" She questioned, her back facing me.

"Her name is Sonya Rose Johnson. But I call her, Sonya Rose." I found myself smirking at the thought of her.

I brought her up because I was tired of talking about the same things over and over. I didn't want to talk about the fight I was in two hours prior. I didn't want to talk about family issues. I just wanted to talk about something else. And Sonya Rose was the first thing that came to mind.

Plus, I haven't talked about her to anyone, really. I also needed advice about this situation. But I'm not going to tell that to her, though.

"Seems like you're fond of her," Janet noted.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I asked, with a confused look on my face.

"It means that you have some sort of affection towards her." She stated as she stirred her coffee, looking at me as if I knew what she was talking about.

"I'm not fond of anyone. She's just like everyone else." I convinced.

"Sounds like that's what you're trying to convince yourself," Janet stated as she sat back down in her beige chair.

I smacked my lips before replying. "Please, I don't need to convince myself anything." I ran my fingers through my straight black hair, making it go back for one split second before it drops back down.

"Well, start from the beginning, how'd you meet her?"

"I was on my way to school, I was just done having sex with some girl, Ashely, maybe Amy? I don't remember her name. She was some blonde that wanted to get piped down, and I wanted to pipe."

"Pipe?" Janet asked, confusion written all over her face.

"It means fuck," I explained.

"Okay," Janet nodded while she scribbled on her notepad. "Continue."

"So after I got done piping, I headed to school. I jumped out of my car and seen an African American girl, semi-long curly hair, reaching her mid-back, and a curvy figure. She turned around, finally revealing her face. Her caramel complexion glowing in the sunlight. Her cheekbones were covered in freckles and her eyes were a beautiful light brown, something like you would rarely see.

She noticed me staring at her, and she looked at me with the confused expression. I did my signature move winking at her, and giving her a smirk. She looked around to make sure that I was doing that to her. And when she realized that I was, she gave a small smile, moved her hair to her back, and walked away. That's when I realized that I wanted her. Not relationship-wise, but the opposite. I wanted her sexually."

"Was that your only encounter with her?" Janet looked up at me, her pen cap grazing her thumb.

"Of course it wasn't," I chuckled. "We had many more."