01: Cheater

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Your POV

I know everything. I know that he's not being loyal to me. I know that the boys knew too but they're hiding it to me. I know he loves her. I heard them saying it when they're together...
you're confused? how can I knew those things? well you know. Our relationship is just I don't know toxic? for me it is.
I'm hurt. I'm broken. I'm lost. But I love him too much to leave him. I want to hear it from him that he found someone else. that he don't want me in his life anymore. that after 4 years and a half our relationship is not worth it anymore. I just want to hear it from him then I'll leave. but it's too much.

Iloveyou
harry said snapping me out of my thoughts.
I stood up walking outside to see the dark and a bunch of stars in the sky. i sigh deeply as i sat down on the grass while hugging my knees up to my chest rocking a bit softly.
am i not enough? am i not that pretty? you're wondering why I didn't answer his Iloveyou a while ago right? well it wasn't for me. he's talking to someone on his phone. and I know that's not Gemma it's her. the girl.
all of our memories are kept repeating through my minds. our first kiss, first hugs,holding hands, unexpected calls, FaceTime, our first iloveyou's...
I felt a little drop on my foot. it's raining a little. but the stars still there. I love stars they makes me calm and relax.

Get inside babe. you'll get sick.
i heard his voice behind as i felt a jacket wrapped around my shoulder. he's caring i know but im not the only one who's loving him. I smiled looking at him not in his eyes but a quick glance then I walk past him. I'm afraid to lose him. but I know one day I will. so I'll trained myself. I will distance myself...

babe? are you ok?
he ask as he entered our bedroom then lay down beside me. I hmm in response only to feel his body pressed against my back.

goodnight.
i heard him whispered. see? he didn't say Iloveyou. everynight before we sleep he's telling me how much he loves me but well everything's change.

I took a deep breath before standing up. making my way through my closet. I packed my things into my luggage quietly.
I don't want to cry anymore. I've been crying over 6 months now since I saw them go out. since harry lied. since harry chose her instead of me. since he broke my heart...

Harry?
I gently shook him. he didn't budge.
Harry? c'mon wake up.
I ran mmy fingers through his hair. I miss doing this. I used to wake him up by running my fingers through his hair while kissing his lips repeatedly.
he opened his eyes then smiled.

hm? what time is it? you ok?
he ask in his deepest voice. I smiled sadly then place my head to his chest as i knelt down beside the bed.

I'm leaving.
as I said those words his eyes widen and he immediately sat up looking straight at me.

what? where are you going?
he ask looking around only to find my luggage near the door.

I don't want to hurt myself anymore harry. it's too much. 6 months you lied. chose her. cheat and broke me. I can't take it anymore. If you love her then why didn't you just tell me? I'm so stupid to wait and hope that you'll say it to my face that you don't want me anymore. harry. did I do something wrong? am I not good enough? I'm sorry... I.- I hope you guys will last long. thank you for the 4 years of being here with me.
I wipe my tears as I kiss him one last time. I love you harry. goodbye
I smiled sadly then walk away.
I'm out now...
I'm not belong to his life now, I'm not going to be his girl now. I won't hurt my heart again.
I smiled to myself as I look up to the sky. it's still dark.
He never stop me from leaving. he never said a last word. he really love the girl. that girl is very lucky.
I'm so done. I don't want to experience something like this anymore. I want to feel the feeling when me and harry's first date it's just so magical. I want to feel a princess again. like when he first called and treat me as his princess.
I want to feel important again... I want to be in someone's life that we can share and both cherish each other. I want that again. I'll be happy. he's happy now. I need to find my happiness again.

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⏰ Last updated: Aug 02, 2017 ⏰

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