365 DAYS

TWO

THE SMELL OF ALCOHOL IS NAUSEATING. It reminds me of the late nights when my father would return home, sad and drunk after my mother passed away. Drinking until his sorrows are gone, I would watch him awake hungover and hoping he could forget her face. And it reminds me of all the times where he would hug me and cry because I looked just like her. 

When he rarely returned home, it didn't bother me anymore. Busying himself in his work, I preferred him away than lounging in the living room with a bottle of tequila in his hand.

Sitting atop a bar stool, I tap my fingers onto the marble counter lightly, humming along with the tune blasting through the speakers. "Water, please," I yell over the noise, hoping he can hear my timid voice.

"Water?" He repeats incredulously. After all, this is a party. An order of water is unexpected. I nod slowly to confirm, watching as he fills a red cup with water. With the music way too loud for my liking and the inconsistent jumping, I'm almost afraid that the floors might break from the commotion. It feels too stuffy, and the large crowd makes me anxious.

After hanging out with Tianna yesterday, Grayson insisted that I tag along to yet, another party. He claims I have a knack for finding the best ones, and I oddly don't know if I should consider it a compliment or not. My mind keeps repeatedly telling me to leave, but my heart is firm and unwavering. Through troubled eyes, I try to search for him. He should be finished playing around by now. It worries me since he seems to attract attention wherever he goes, and not quite the good kind. His temper is unpredictable, and it always ends up with a fight. And as many times as I scold him, he never seems to change.

With the house being in the middle of nowhere, I'm almost glad that he can't stir up trouble too far. Surrounded by acres and acres of trees, this is just like horror movies. As I push through a large crowd, I find a wide circle with people chanting and cheering someone on. "This cannot be happening again. I really can't let him get arrested again," I murmur, massaging my temples as I prepare myself to separate another fight. "Excuse me. Sorry." I shout, nudging past everyone until I'm at the front. At this point in time, I'm not surprised to find Grayson atop an unfamiliar face. Although his punches are sloppily thrown, there's no doubt it will leave a mark.

"Don't ever say shit like that to my face ever again," Grayson sneers lividly with knuckles covered in blood, and I hope it's not his.

The boy beneath him squirms, attempting to free himself. "She's hot, and everyone here knows it! What difference does it make if you just share her?" He shouts, smiling mockingly between his fits of wheezes. "You just want to her to yourself, greedy bastard. Everyone wants a taste of what those lips-"

"I fucking told you," hisses Grayson, swinging with all his might down at the poor boy's face. It's a mess, and I've never seen him as angry as he has been now. Rushing toward him, I know he won't stop anytime soon if I don't do something. I clench my knuckles, aiming straight for his jaw the same way Grayson has taught me. When his head snaps in the opposite direction, a series of gasps echo all around me. They must be wondering if I don't value my life at all.

An immediate pain erupts throughout my hand, and I resist the urge to cry out. There's a lethal gaze on Grayson's face, and his fists begin to shake furiously. And quite frankly, I'm scared of what he might be capable of doing. When his heated gaze meets my eye, his expression softens.

Getting to his feet, he steps over the mess he created and peers at his bloody knuckles. "Have I scared you?" He murmurs in a melancholy tone that makes my knees weak. Grayson seems genuinely regretful, and it hurts my heart.

I stride towards him, tugging at his arm to follow me. "Let's go, Grayson."

He sobers up, leaning towards me. Crouching, I pick up the black jean jacket that I gifted him last Christmas. And safe to say, he liked it a lot.

"Don't be mad at me, Leah, please," he begs, wrapping a protective arm around my shoulder. "I don't want to lose you."

My actions are impulsive, wrapping my arm around his waist. "I-I'm not mad," I breathe, "I just hate violence. Let's get you home and cleaned up."

Nodding, he holds my hand, stumbling and swaying with each step. "I think I had too much to drink," he slurs. Ignoring him, I try my best to push him into the passenger seat of his BMW, but he doesn't budge an inch. Instead, he stands in his position, studying me.

"What are you staring at?" I demand, "You're drunk. Get in the car."

Grayson hiccups, tilting his head, "A-At you."

My words are caught in my throat, confined in the back of my mind. All the confessions I want to say, yet I can't—don't have the courage to. "We should go," I breathlessly state. Grayson's warmth is dangerously addicting.

"I don't want to go yet," he pouts, arms enfolding around my waist. He draws our bodies closer until I can strongly smell the alcohol from his breath. If I inch any closer, we'll kiss. I part my lips, facing away from his gaze.

With my hands on his chest, I attempt to push him away. "Grayson, let go of me and get inside."

He traps me between the car doors, his breath goes closer to my ears, which my legs feel like they're going weak. I am afraid that I might pass out. "No," he smirks, kissing my jaw.

"No," I close my eyes, focusing on the situation and not his lips that connect with my neck, "You are drunk, and you will not remember this tomorrow." I don't want to be that drunken mistake he makes.

Grayson shakes his head, sucking, and my breath increases, "You smell like vanilla, and it's driving me crazy, Leah."

I bite back a gasp, pushing his head away from my neck, knowing that he has given me a hickey. "Don't do this," I whisper, feeling the tears wield in my eyes, "You'll only break my heart in the end."

But he doesn't hear me. Instead, his eyes dilate and flicker to my lips. Before I can completely free myself, he roughly grasps my jaw, forcing our lips to lock. My mind goes blank, unable to comprehend what the hell is happening.

And when reality hits me, I kiss him back with my arms around his neck, drawing him closer as if he'll disappear. Fingers tangle into my hair, his teeth gnaw at my bottom lip, demanding access. And when I do so, a string of curses erupt from a few feet away from us.

Immediately unlocking my lips, missing how he tasted, I turn my head, "B-But you said," her voice breaks, "You know I'm in love with him!" Trixie screams, "Y-You told me you would help me!"

"Trixie," I begin, trying my best to conjure up with an explanation, but there is nothing I can say.

Angrily, she wipes away the tears that continue to fall, and all I can see in those green eyes are loathe. "Y-You lied to me," she seethes, tugging at her hair, "I will fucking make you feel the way I feel!" she exhales, vociferously, "I will enjoy the way you'll look when I take who you love most right in front of your eyes."

"Fuck off, Trixie," fumes Grayson, flicking her off. "You better not be threatening her."

Fear passes through her eyes before she turns her back, fleeing into the house once more. I'm not surprised that before she enters inside, she takes one last look at me before smiling, waving as she slams the door closed. This is the first time I've ever seen her hostile, and I have a gut-wrenching feeling in my stomach.

Without another word, I whip open Grayson's BMW, giving him a shove inside. He doesn't protest but quickly sits as I make my way onto the driver's seat. As I suspect Grayson will say something, I shake my head, "I am not in the mood right now, Grayson," I say, "Not tonight, just forget everything."

But turning to glance at him, his eyes are already closed, and I realize he hasn't heard a single word from me. He's blacked-out drunk and won't remember anything tomorrow morning. He will forget the kiss, forget my feelings, and after tonight, all I'll be is his best friend.

This, after all, could be considered a drunken mistake. And I don't think I'm ready to face that. "I love you, Grayson," I murmur, "I've loved you for years, but you don't even notice it."