Emo Love

My new home

I'M SO SORRY FOR NOT WRITING IN A LONG TIME!!!!!!! 

Well, this chapter is extra long! 

How are you guys liking it so far? I don't really have a lot of ideas, so that's why I haven't been writing lately...

Well, comment, vote, fan, and like! Tell me how I did? (:

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Chapter 12

A long chat

I raised my hand up to my face, and placed it onto my face. It took me a minute to be able to speak again. Memories flooded my head. When I was a child, the times where I hated my mom, and cussed at her, and the times where we had a bit of fun.

Everything came back now. Justin's mom's baby shower- what will I tell them? 'Oh sorry, I can't make it because my mom got raped and died'? On the bright side, I still had that Black Veil Brides concert to go to...

But that doesn't matter at the moment. My mother, the woman who took care of me for seventeen years, passed away. Knowing that part of it was my fault, hurt the most.

If I didn't have that stupid panic attack, I could have beaten up that son of a bitch who raped and killed my mom. Part of this was my fault. Oh, and if I hadn't dragged my mom to go to the doctors, everything would have been fine. 

I looked back up at the nurse, and gulped down a bunch of tears that were forming in my throat. 

"Okay, can I see her, one more time, before I go?" I asked, barely able to speak.

"Yes, of course. Follow me," she lead me to the room, even though I already knew which room it is. I stepped through the door, and found my mother covered in a blue, rough sheet.

The nurse pulled back the sheet, and I saw my mother. I saw the wounds on her arms and legs, and I saw a tiny, but very deep cut on her throat.

"Aw, ma," I burst out into tears as I locked my fingers around hers. I sat in a stool, and glanced at the nurse. She quickly left the room, and I pressed my lips on my mother's forehead.

"Ma, i'm so sorry I let this happen, words can't explain how sorry I am. I shouldn't have dragged you to go to the doctors, it was my fault. I shouldn't have let myself have a panic attack, it's just i'm weak, and I panic easily."

I continued, "I'm going to miss you so much, I love you too much. Even though sometimes i'm a cold bitch to you, deep down I don't really mean the words I spit at you. Because, well, your my mother, and you took great care of me," I recited, barely able to speak.

"And I just want you to know that I love you so much, and that I so very thankful that I had a mom that's caring and amazing," I finished off. 

I waited for about one minute, and then I got up. I kissed her cheek and forehead one last time, and squeezed her hand tight. "I love you," I whispered as tears sprang down my face, onto the blue bed sheet.

I walked out of the room, and saw the nurse, talking to a doctor.

"Done?" she turned to me and asked.

"I guess so," I sighed.

"Alright, well, do you have a ride home?" she asked.

"I guess I can just take a cab," I shrugged.

"Okay, hang in there. I wish you the best of luck," she smiled.

"Thank you," I said as I turned around and headed for the front entrance. I slowly walked out of the hospital, to see a couple of cabs across the street. I run across the street, and walk up to a cab.