PAPER PLANES
by Katherine (-dauntless)
He cupped my cheeks and rested his forehead against mine, our eyes closed, our nose touching each other and our breaths simply meet at the tiny space between our lips. It’s tormenting to be this close to him before he leaves. I should be happy because we’re this near with each other. I should be glad that he’s holding me like this. I should feel triumphant because he chose to be with me before he leaves.
But I am not and I will never be because I know this has to end and at the end of this moment he will still go away. He will still leave me behind. Nothing in my mind seems to help me conquer this sadness I am feeling right now. My brain is filled with misery, heartaches and scenarios I don’t want to welcome ever again in my head. As my mind is full of those shits my heart also is a vault hiding those things even if they’re supposed to be disposed.
My body is a locked giant treasure chest securing pains and agonies.
“I love you,” he murmured and I froze. “Promise me you’ll hold on to that.”
It’s amazing how I still get shocked whenever he says that he loves me. It’s like those words formed an alarm clock that I didn’t really set but still, it will ring taking me away from dreamland. His “I love you’s” are my reminder that I don’t need dreams anymore to wake up with a smile, because even when my eyes are wide open he can still make me happy.
“I love you and I promise to hold on to you, to us.” I said forming my lips into a tiny smile.
He let go of me. I opened my eyes and saw him smiling like he won a price in a game show. That certain action of his made me smile even more. I felt like crying but we promised to each other that we will never shed even a single tear at this moment.
This is us, fond of promises.
“Bye.” He told me and before I even say goodbye to him he immediately turned his back at me and walked slowly towards the airplane.
I watched him while making his way to the plane but I can’t stand it so every fifteen seconds I have to look away. Seeing him walking away from me already splits my heart into two. Before the plane closes its door he looked back at me, I waved and wore a painful smile for him. He waved back and smiled.
And as the door closes my tears went running on my cheeks.
I decided to go home hoping to ease the pain but when I got into our house it only reminded me of him. When I lied on my bed I smelled his sweet scent. I closed my eyes and I can see him smiling at me. It’s only the first day and I’m already going crazy. But shit always happens and he has to stay away for two months. I wonder what will happen to me in two months.
