It was late at night, close to midnight. You stared at the clock, sitting at the dining room table.
You felt sick Sick in a way that medications couldn't fix the pain in your head.
The fork in your hands played with the hot noodles in the bowl and you were sad. You sighed, pushing the bowl foward.
You stared at your phone, checking the screen again in search of a call from shawn.
You had called him literally thirty times, wishing he would answer your constant texts and calls.
You groaned, closing your eyes. Everyone was posting videos and pictures of shawn. He was drinking and partying and enjoying his time.
And you, his girlfriend, sat alone at the dining room table, eating a cup a noodle. You sighed, feeling this weird feeling of yourself hollow out.
It's hard to explain. The feeling that when you're about to cry, you feel your throat drying, and your eyes blurring with vision slowly.
You sniffled, opening the refrigerator to see the cake you had made for shawn.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
You wiped your eyes, pushing the thought into your head, "shawn couldn't be here, he wanted to but he couldn't." You said to yourself.
Yet he's partying and drinking.
The clock ticked 11:59 and you sighed.
"Time for bed." You said to yourself, pulling yourself up the stairs and up the dark hallway. You slipped into the cold sheets, pushing yourself onto shawn's side of the bed.
You always slept on your side. No matter shawn being there or not. But with the feeling of loathing and anger you slipped to his sheets. You never slept on shawn's side. Especially of hope he'd come home.
But he wouldn't.
The more you laid in bed, beginning to sob, the more you thought of what he was doing. Shawn was always a party animal. That's how you met him. He's probably with some blonde right now. Running his fingers over her body and kissing down her neck.
You groaned, closing your eyes tightly, sobbing hard.
You pushed yourself onto shawn's side, inhaling a sharp breath of his scent.
You cried harder against his pillow, inhaling his scent harder and harder until it was hard for you to breathe.
You felt as a pair of arms slipped around your waist and you froze up. "Baby what are you doing on my side?" Shawn whispered against your ear, kissing your neck lightly.
"Shawn?" You spun around as he grinned but then it slowly wiped away. "Baby why are you crying?" Shawn whispered, taking his thumbs against your cheeks and wiping the tears away.
"You weren't here. I didn't get to- to take pictures of you and the cake-" "You made me a cake?"
"Yeah. . . . I spent many hours on it. And you were drinking a-and partying and I didn't-" Shawn's lips smashed onto yours as he held your face lightly
You kissed shawn back immediately, feeling as he lifted you up onto his lap.
"S-shawn. . ." You moaned lightly, closing your eyes as he kissed down your neck, sucking lightly on the sweetspot he memorized.
"I-i missed you." You whispered as shawn pulled away. His hands rubbing up and down on your sides lightly.
"Aww baby I missed you too." You bit your lip. "I thought you forgot about me." He laughed. "How could i? I even brought your favorite-"
Shawn held up muffins. You scoffed, "That's your favorite shawn. . ." You laughed.
"Right, what about this?" He held up strawberry vodka. "I love you y/n. . . . Don't forget that." Shawn said into your ear, kissing it softly.
"I love you too shawn." He grinned.
"So how about that cake hm? Bet it's delicious. . . .maybe as delicious as something else." He stared you up and down, smirking and rolling his tongue over his lips.
You laughed, smacking his arm.
"I love you." His fingers intertwined with yours. "I love you too."
. . . . For me I have about fourty minutes until shawn's birthday is over. I looked up his age and it said 19 and I wanted to cry. Awesomeness TV has a happy birthday shawn thing too.
I am so glad that I am able to have in my own way known shawn. He is such an amazing person. He makes me smile and laugh and want to be apart of this world. He has left such an influence on all of us with his kindness and his love. He is a beautiful person inside and out. I love him dearly.
And I'm glad I'm back. I'll be sticking around for a while😏
