Secret//ChanDae #Wattys2019

First Love

Jongdae

I waited behind the curtain peeking out nervously. You'd think that since we've been performing for so long I'd be used to the anxious feeling I get when I look at the stage, but I'm not. I felt someone place their hand on my shoulder and squeeze. "Don't be so nervous Chen, it'll be over before you know it." Chanyeol whispered. Iturned to glare at him. "That isn't helping." I shrugged off his hand and walked to my dressing room to get ready. Nothing was better than being an idol and having stage fright. It's always fun near the end though, I forget about all of my fears and just enjoy the time I have in the spotlight with thousands of fans chanting and waving their lightsticks and banners. "And 1, 2, 3, go!" Our manager signaled us to go out onto the stage. We ran out, but of course I almost fell. Chanyeol ran up next to me and bent down infront of me. "Hop on clumsy." I laughed and hesitantly jumped onto his back. "You're heavy Chen!" I smacked the back of his head. "I'm not heavy. I just eat a lot of food." He chuckled and gripped my thighs to push me up further onto his back and jogged towards the others.

After the concert

We all had so much fun during the concert except for the last part. Suho had nudged my arm and pointed to a sign. A girl held up a sign saying that she wanted Suho to rape her. We were both disgusted. Why must fans be so nasty? I placed my hand on his shoulder as an attempt to comfort him, but he pushed my hand away. I walked away to let him calm down, and I went over to Xiumin. I told him to let Suho be on his own for a while and to let the others know so he can calm down from the sign. Chanyeol and Kyungsoo came up to me to see what was happening. After I explained the situation they felt uncombfortable. I started to feel upset and teared up. I hate how fans could be this way. Chanyeol hugged me and Kyungsoo patted my back as I started to cry, it isn't right how this girl is acting toward Suho. I just want Suho to feel safe during concerts but because of her he can't. Xiumin went up to Suho and hugged him tightly. "Ah he's so caring it makes me sick." Kyungsoo mumbled. Kai put his arm around Kyungsoo' shoulder and leaned on him. "Are you sure it makes you sick? Because if it does then i'll stop caring about you so much." He pouted. Kyungsoo shook his head and smiled. We all made kissing noises. "Hey!" Kyungsoo ran after us trying to kick us.

At the dorm

I sat in my room thinking about Chanyeol. I can't get him off my mind lately. "Why is he so amazing and... well hot?" I groaned rolling over. My eyes widened to see Suho standing in the doorway smiling. "Who's the amazing hot guy?" He sat on the edge of my bed smirking. "Not you." I huffed and burried my face in my pillow. "Of course it's not me, I'm amazing and sexy." I scoffed. So full of himself. "It's Chanyeol. I think I like him. But i've never liked anybody beofre so I don't know." He smiled and patted my back. "How do you feel when you're around him?" I smiled gently and closed my eyes. "When I'm around Chanyeol I never feel afraid, I feel so happy but nervous. And when he hugs me I feel like there's thousands of butterflies in my stomach trying to break free. Do you think I'm weird for liking a man hyung?" Suho laughed and shook his head. "Of course not, you are allowed to like whoever you want. I'm not going to be the one to judge you for what you do. As long as you don't try to force it onto me I don't care." I hugged and thanked him. "Go to bed, you can sleep in. We have the day off." Suho left and I just stared at the ceiling. It was almost 3Am before I finally went to bed. I couldn't stop thinking of the concert. Chanyeol carrying me on his back, hugging me while I cried not even caring if I got tears on his shirt. I'm glad I can call Chanyeol my friend. But I also wish I could call him more than a friend.

Morning

I woke up to a loud thud in my room and dishes clattering. I shut up out off bed but instantly felt a sharp pain in my foot. I yelped and fell back onto my bed. "Oh my god Chen are you ok? I'm so sorry I didn't mean for you to get hurt I was just trying to bring you breakfast and I tripped." I looked up to see Baekhyun hovering above me. "Hey what's going on in here?" Soon everyone was in my room. "I fell and the dish broke so Chen tried to check what happened and he got glass in his foot, I'm so sorry I didn't mean it." I grabbed Baek's hand. "It's ok, it's not like you knew it would happen. Plus it's hard to see in here." Kyungsoo turned on a light, blood was streaming down my foot and dripping on the floor. Sehun ran to the bathroom to grab the first aid kit and towels. "Give those to me." Kyungsoo carefully took the glass out of my foot with tweezers, soaked the towel in peroxide and pressed it to my foot while using one hand to take the bandages and gauze out of the box. He wrapped up my foot and told Xiumin to go to the kitchen to check for any pain relievers. He told me to take 2 and not to walk on my foot for an hour or two. "Yeah sure, thanks doc." We all laughed. "Do you want us to stay so you won't get bored." I smiled and shook my head. "I'll be okay, you guys go do something fun." They hesitated but left one by one. But Chanyeol and Baekhyun stayed. Baekhyun felt guilty so he wanted to make it up to me, but Chanyeol just wanted to stay because he was bored. I told Baek to stop apologizing and go have some fun with the others. Now it was just me and Chanyeol. "So how does your foot feel?" He walked over and laid next to me. "It feels fine now, I expected it to be a lot worse." He nodded and put his head on my stomach. "I'm gonna nap if that's fine with you." All I could do was nod. I started getting nervous and felt a little sick. He put one arm around my waist and put his head on my chest. I smiled a little and put my hand on his back. He started to yawn a lot and his eyes started to tear up. He finally fell asleep, and when he started snoring I knew that now was the time. I played with his hair for a while until I too fell asleep.

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