They say no one will hear you scream out in space. There are no particles for the sound waves to travel across.
How free that must feel; being able to shout anything you want out into the empty void with no one to judge what you are saying. A dark, free, empty chasm to hideaway in.
At this moment, I needed my own piece of outer space.
The rain hadn't halted for a month and a half. Grayson was coming back home today from a week long hunting trip. It was October fourteenth. The day before my birthday.
I was laying on my bed studying for Monday's first quarter history exam. Billy was downstairs with some of his fishing buddies, one of which being Margot's dad.
Margot was sitting at my desk piling on her makeup for the homecoming dance. "Are you sure you don't want to come?" She asked me kindly.
"No. We have that history test Monday, remember? I have to study."
"Oh right. I forgot I'm best friends with a future Cornell Alumni." Margot joked.
By the grace of God himself, I had gotten into my dream college, Cornell. If I was going to attend in the fall of next year was entirely unknown. If I were to turn, could I really even go to college?
"Margot can I ask you something?" My tone was suddenly serious. My friend turned to me with a confused look on her face.
"Sure. Anything."
I sighed. "If you had to choose between the love of your life and with them a life full of adventure, or a secure, safe life in this sane mundane world, which would you pick?"
"What's this about?" Asked Margot.
I shrugged. "I don't know. Just curious I guess."
Margot walked over to the bed, gently moved my history textbook out of the way and sat on the edge of the mattress. "Let me guess, Grayson asked you to take off a year between college and high school to travel, but you just want to head straight into college right?"
"Yeah." I lied. "How'd you know?"
"Just lucky I guess."
Obviously, I couldn't inform Margot of the real reasoning behind my question. If I were to tell my friend I was debating about becoming a vampire before or after college, she would think I was crazy.
"But what if I'm really not sure. I'm torn between what is safe, and what I know could be a gamble."
"Then choose what excites you." My friend finished before turning back over to my desk to finish applying her makeup.
Fifteen minutes passed and something shiny and black flashed by my window. There was he honking of a car horn from outside and I looked out to see Bruce pull up in his red pickup.
"That'll be my ride." Margot said. "Now, are you sure you don't want to go? I can get Bruce to wait a few more minutes-"
"No really I'm fine," I looked back out the window to the oversized raven perched on the pine tree directly outside of my window. "Have fun though. You look amazing."
"Bye Em," Margot shouted as she ran out of my room towards Bruce's car. I waved after my two friends as they drove off down the road towards the Homecoming dance.
"I see you there Grayson," I began after sliding open my window. "I didn't know you'd be coming to see me tonight."
The raven flew into my room and with one graceful flap of its wings transformed into the boy I'd grown to love over the past year, Grayson.
Grayson's eyes were a bright butterscotch color and his skin felt warmer than usual. I'd gotten used to his ice cold touch. Sometimes, I'd find myself intentionally making myself cold in order to be reminded of his sweet embrace.
"I missed you," he said before bending down to caress my lips with his. Grayson's kisses were always soft and never ceased to ignite fireworks within my core.
"Missed you too." I tried to pull away from his lips, but his hand behind my neck stopped me. Grayson pulled me in for another leg weakening kiss. Once he was fully satisfied, he pulled away.
"Happy birthday," he muttered. "You're eighteen now. The same age as me." Grayson said the last part as a joke. I smiled.
"My birthday isn't for another four hours Gray."
"Oh, well. I still brought your present."
Gray handed by a small, black bag with iridescent wrapping paper sticking out of the top. "I thought I told you I didn't want to present this year Gray."
"Trust me you'll like this one."
I smiled and pulled the tissue paper from out of the bag allowing the present to be seen.
"No way." I said to myself.
"It took me forever to find but once I finally did, it was all worth it."
Grayson had given me an original copy of the Tale of Two Cities. The spine of the book was peeling, and the pages smelled and were mildew slicker, but I didn't care. This was perhaps one of the most thoughtful and special gifts I'd ever received.
"I'll never forget our first connection," Grayson began. "Reciting the introduction to one of the greatest literary works of all time."
"This is a absolutely amazing you know that right?" I gently placed the book onto the bed and pulled Grayson in for a hug.
During our long embrace, Grayson couldn't stop fidgeting. I thought that maybe he was uncomfortable, so I let him go.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"I'm sorry Em it's just you smell so good and I'm still kind of thirsty and...I just don't want to hurt you."
I knitted my eyebrows. "Where is this coming from? You haven't hurt me yet have you?"
After my encounter with the Puppeteer during the attack on Headquarters, Grayson had become extra weary of me and never stopped treating me like a fragile piece of glass. Yes, I was used to him being protective, but in the last few months, it'd been a little extreme.
"I'm just gonna go. I love you, Emily. And I'll see you at school tomorrow."
And without another word, Grayson was gone; transformed into a raven and nothing more than a black flicker in the nighttime sky.
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