Corsets

 Intro

Every day I stare out of my window far beyond the horizon straining to see beyond my poor eye sight abilities. Straining to see what cannot be seen. Straining to see what’s truly outside of these dungeon walls that I call my home. Even though I know that every time I look outside of my window that I will see nothing but vast green land. I always just hope to see the one who will take me away from this hell of mine.

"Katherine!" Mistresses rigid voice hissed, bringing me out of my thoughts.

I couldn't help but let my eyes roll as I turned away from the window to be met with her stern eyes.  

"Another one of your day dreams I suppose"

she said with a scoff, examining my all but "lady like attire” as she would call it.

“Speaking of dreams don't you have work to do down in landers hall. You wouldn't want to keep the ladies of Landern waiting, Katherine would you?” she said, cocking her head to the side.

It took all of me not to swear; I bit my tongue like a lady and replied with“no Mistress” I say in a low tone but never once daring to take my eyes away from here. Refusing to let her have the one thing that she could not control.

As she began to head towards the exit of Lady Clarissa's quarters she stopped. Without hesitation she barely gave me the respect of looking me in the eyes   “you know Katherine, you should be grateful for being able to have the opportunity of class and elegance that the ladies of Landern possess.”

I couldn’t help but scoff as she dared to let that lie roll off her tongue. To associate those pigs with class and elegance.

.t lie in that moment I couldn't help but to remember all of those years sitting in mothers lap as she told stories of the Landern courting.

Of the ladies in their gowns that swept the floor like the peasants brooms on an early morning, the unbearable heat of the room that some would say that was the heat of the ladies cheeks when they gossiped about the courters. The perfume filled air mixed with a summer’s breeze that filled the room.

When mother talked of the Landern courtingI could see a light in her usual dull brown eyes. I could hear the excitement in voice as she told vivid stories of the courting. I could feel the life booming in her as she danced me around our living quarters humming the tune that seemed to be the source of all her energy and all of her happiness. But when she lost all of her child like energy that same tune seemed to be the source of all of her sorrow.

“Besides dear, it may be the closest that you'll ever be to a courter other than to be his maid,”  my face was straight as her poison-like words pulled me out of my memories. She spit those words of poison onto my face waiting for me to flinch at one of her many attempts to make me feel like trash.

“Because girls like that” she motioned over to Lady Clarissa's portrait “belong on a throne and girls like you” she said clapping her hands together “belong well” she said, tittering, turning to walk away, “belong at her feet.”

Her words hit me like fire, but they were burns that I seemed to no longer feel, burns that that made my heart numb and my eyes just like the dull eyes of my mother. I knew that deep down that her bitter words were lies. Deep down I knew that I was more than just a servant girl who barely had anything more than trinkets and the clothes that lay on her back. Even though I knew it all so well that I was more than kust a servant girl or not that that’s all that I would ever be.