Griffin & Blake S5

S5 E01 part 1

Author's note:
I will have some fan art on my stories soon so you guys can easily envision the characters Griffin and Blake!
Just a quick reminder this story takes place after the season 4 finale, so that means spoilers for people that are not caught up in the show. Also if you didn't read the description you might be really confused, I wanted to reverse the genders in the Bellarke romance, I thought it might be interesting to explore my theories of what will happen in season 5 with Griffin (Clarke as a male) and Blake (Bellamy as a female). I hope that clears some things up, and you guys enjoy the story. Please leave a comment, so I know what you guys like and dont! :)
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4 months after Praimfaya

Griffin

"Please let this work.."Griffin thought to himself as he fidgeted with the radio. He was testing all the knobs and buttons to check for damage. He thought about what Raven would do. There was no guarantee his friends had made it to the Ark, despite his best efforts. Once he found the radio in Becca's lab he had hardly been able to stop thinking about it, he could communicate with them! He thought about what he might say. To Raven, he would be relieved to have her problem solving skills help him navigate this new world. Moreover, he would tell Blake not to be hard on herself and that everything worked out, he was alive, he desperately wanted her to know he was alive. Griffin thought he should wait for the weather to get better. He remembered how hard it had been to talk to the Ark from the drop ship during the big storm. That was when he needed his mom's help via radio to remove a knife from Finn's chest. Another friend gone...Griffin was longing for someone to talk to, being the last person on Earth's surface didn't help much either.

All Griffin could do was think, feel, and survive. He would think about reaching his friends on the radio, the mere thought squeezed his chest so tight he would forget to breath. Other times he would feel forsaken... never seeing the point in getting out of bed, eating, or following any sort of routine.

When he closes his eyes for sleep he wishes for dreams, but often gets nightmares. In the night terrors his friends all die by his hand. A reality that is all too real, considering Griffin doesn't know if they were able to get into the Ark.

Griffin moved his hands through his shaggy blonde hair, it was getting too long now. He hated the way it fell into his eyes, or tickled his neck. He thought about cutting it many times, but it was also another way for him to measure time. Eventually, he would give in and cut it off again, but he had a long way to go before he needed to care about appearances. He smiled at that last thought, because does he really want to impress anyone? Of course he does, trying to be positive he thinks, "may we meet again". The words bring him comfort quickly fleeting as he ponders the possibility of seeing Blake again.

Griffin pressed his hands hard into the bend of his arms. It was a way for him to feel like he still had some control and wasn't falling apart. This happened sometimes when he remembered Blake, which was a lot. They had gone through so much together, and they were finally getting to a place where they might both be ready to start something. She was fiercely loyal a quality Griffin never quite felt worthy of. They both had a crazy amount of trust in each other that helped them move past the traumas since being on the ground. He would do anything to see her again, she wore a mask most of the time trying to be strong for everyone, but Griffin felt he could see past that. She was all heart, impulsive and loyal...Griffin realized this too late but Blake was also in his heart more than a friend should be.

Griffin walked around Becca's lab, and made his way over to the rations his friends left behind. He hadn't been eating very much, apparently your body rejecting radiation will do that to a person. Griffin had only started feeling better about a couple weeks ago. It had been hard to keep track of the days in the lab, it all seemed to just blend together. The food had become a great counting tool to mark the meals and days, and the process was reinforced when he found a digital calendar that was battery operated. Griffin was still too nervous to venture outside the lab though, but knew he would eventually have to. The night blood had worked, and he could survive with the death wave out of the way. There are more rations in the bunker on the island. And hopefully when that resource was exhausted, Earth would be more helpful.

Griffin sat in a chair and stuffed the protein bar into his mouth, only slightly aware he was chewing with his mouth open. Manners don't mean much when your alone. He looked over at the digital calendar knowing one day even that would die. Day 121...still a long way to go. He glanced back over at the radio and contemplated being brave enough to try, even though everything in his brain told him it couldn't possibly work. He was desperate to communicate with someone, to hear another voice, not totally knowing what it might do to his psyche if he never did.

Blake

Blake had been having a hard time, and the last 120 days had been a true test of character. She longed for some peace and quiet. The 7 of them were all living in close proximity to each other and fighting had become a frequent occurrence. She had listened to Griffin, on Earth, and left him behind, she went against her instinct and it had tormented her ever since. It was so hard knowing that he sacrificed himself for all of them. Griffin had told her to use her head and survive, that thought always twisted her stomach unfavorably. She hated being told to use her head, it slowed her down, and being slow meant she couldn't save him. Blake believed if the situation was reversed Griffin would have found a way to save her, and it haunted her that she couldn't save him. Raven and Monty were comforting, they both knew something about what she was going through. Monty had to leave behind Jasper, and Raven knew all about internal battles with oneself.

She remembered watching the last bit of Earth be scorched by the death wave from the Ark. Raven stood next to her, and they remembered Griffin and vowed to honor his sacrifice, so that he did not die in vain. By now the yelling had escalated and Blake could hear what the fight was about. Emori had taken something from Raven. She took something that she recognized from her salvaging days, and Raven freaked out because she didn't want it to break. It wasn't like her, but Blake rolled her eyes and desparatley wished for an escape. Soon the group would eventually rope her into the dispute to end it. They all looked to her as their leader, a role she was mostly okay with. Griffin would know how to handle this, was always the thought before any decision. Griffin brought people together and inspired them, helped them see a bigger picture. Blake's confidence as a leader has lessened, but her friends dependence on her as a leader had only increased since returning to space. She wished Griffin was there to help and take some of the pressure off.

Blake walked down one of the halls and found a room. She wanted a moment to herself, and let herself scream maybe even cry. She breathed deeply for a moment, and then a roar erupted from her chest that surprised her. She laughed after the release, it felt good to let it out. She ran her fingers through her dark, messy hair and did a quick spin to check for witnesses. She would have been embarrassed if anyone saw her, but she was alone. She walked around the room shamelessly snooping and her eyes landed on a mirror. She looked broken and couldn't make sense of any of her emotions. She began crying before she could think of why. Something was missing, someone was missing. And she felt there was no way she can survive the loss...she laid on the bed and reminded herself on why she needed to live, the only family she had left. Octavia.