Imagine you're sitting in the extremely popular, Restaurant Gordon Ramsay. The lights are dim, outside the windows the night life of London is thriving. Everything is perfect. However the fancy restaurant and extravagant food are only minor aspects in making this evening absolute heaven on earth. The thing that makes this night so perfect is the man sat across from you. You and Liam have been dating for 2 years exactly. Tonight marks the 2 year anniversary of the beginning of your beautiful, love filled relationship. Every time you look at that astounding man your heart fills with joy and your mind is filled with memories so happy they almost take away the pain of My Chemical Romance's breakup.
The two of you are enjoying a peaceful silence as you finish your delicious meal when suddenly Liam takes your petite hand into his large, strong one. He looks deep into your soul with his unbelievable, comforting brown eyes. The words that came out of his mouth would change your life forever. As if his words were silk, the words "Will you marry me?" sweetly wisp their way through your ears. Of course you immediately say
"YES LIAM OF COURSE!"
Once again those silk like words brush your ears as Liam says "I love you so much *your name*, I can't wait to spend our lives together. I wrote you a song, may I sing it?"
You are in such awe you simply nod your head yes. Suddenly Liam opens his mouth and the most foul sound ever created erupts from his mouth. It causes the other customers to vomit profusely. Innocent people walking by fall to their knees, searing pain shooting through their ears and brain. For some reason you remain unharmed and for some reason straight from hell, Liam continues to sing. There is a sudden CRASH! THE Gordon Ramsay rushes over to your table with a ginormous meat cleaver.
"Wot the bloody fuck is coming out of that ignoramus's mouth?!" Gordon yells at the top of his lungs. What in the fuck was Simon thinking letting this simpleton live let alone go on past auditions? That wanker has always had it out for me"
"Gordon, do you have any idea why I have not been taken down by his voice along with everyone else?" You ask
"Well, Simon has a secret drug he hired scientists to crate. It makes even vocal ass like that sound good. I suspect Liam has been slipping it to you."
"How dare that halfwit do this to me? Fucking men. I knew I should have stuck to dating women!" You become angrier by the second. Gordon is about to say something else but suddenly he has enough of Liam.
"SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH YOU DOLT" Gordon screeches as he repetitively chops though Liam's neck with his cleaver.
You decide to stay until the police arrive. Of course they presented Gordon with an award for finally killing that fucker. They have a team of professional crime scene cleaners to take care of the mess. You see everything is fine now so you decide to take a cab to 221 Baker Street and check out the Sherlock museum. At the museum you notice a gorgeous woman, seemingly close to your age. The rest is history. That night you met the woman you would fall in love with, marry and adopt children with. You love her so very much it hurts you to know you'll be be leaving her soon. You are now 84, you have been struggling with cancer for a few years now. The cancer being contracted from Liam's voice of course. Liam asking you to marry him truly did change your life forever. If it weren't for him you would have never met your wife that means everything to you, you would have never adopted the children you love so deeply and you would't have gotten to see Gordon Ramsay cut his fucking neck off. The life drains from your cancer soaked body when the radio in your room, set to the oldies station plays that cancer causing song; Strip that down.
