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hot..hot..hot

Derek pulls me into a hug but I cant help thinking about Niall. I start to feel guilty about cutting Niall off completely but then I remember that was my initial plan anyways. It doesn't make me feel better though, I guess it's a way for me to justify it to myself. Derek eventually pulls away and wants to lay down and watch tv, so as he does I snuggle into his chest,my mind goes to Niall again and I feel all the guilt seep into my mind. I know Niall left and completely ignored me but do I really want to keep hurting his feelings like he hurt mine? I know I can't keep up this mean act for much longer, I'm not heartless. I really don't want to ruin what me and Derek have, but I don't want to lose Niall again. I know he can be annoying sometimes but he's always had a place in my heart, even when I didn't want him to.

I look up at Derek, the first thing I see is his deep brown eyes that compliment his tanned skin and messy brown hair. I run my fingers through his hair making his brown eyes leave the tv screen. He leans down pressing his lips to my forehead.

"I love you" I whisper into his neck before kissing his jawline.

"I love you too"he says leaning his head back giving me more access.

I kiss down the side of his throats and to his collar, where I suck until I hear him groan. He rolls over on top of me and begins kissing down my neck till he gets to the collar of my shirt. he bites his lip looking into my eyes for permission. I pull my shirt off and he kisses down the center of my chest between my boobs. He pushes my braw aside and grabs one nipple playing with it while he sucks the other making me moan. He continues on until I hear his phone ringing he reaches for it, and I think he's about to turn it off but he looks at it and when I look into his eyes and I see something change in his facial expression before he pulls away and coughs. I try to look into his eyes but he wont meet mine. He slides out of bed and rubs the back of his neck as he scans my room, looking for something.

"where are you doing" I ask as his eyes stop on his shirt, and pulls it on above his head.

"I have to go, sorry"

"where" I say frowning as I pull my shirt on and re-adjust myself. Are you kidding me?

"It's getting late and I forgot I still have homework I have to finish" He says walking out the door. I look at my phone checking the time.

"But it's only  eight" I yell before I hear the front door shut.

"what the fuck" I say to myself.

why was he acting so strange. I hear my stomach rumble and realize I haven't eaten yet today. I go down stairs and heat up some of the left overs from yesterday's dinner. I hear the door open as I take it out the microwave and set it on the counter. I grab a fork and cut a piece of steaming hot lasagna and stick it in my mouth, before I feel how hot it actually is.

"hot...hot..hot" I mumble trying to fan my mouth to cool the burning hot food in it.

"Yeah a mouth full of half eaten food is very hot" Niall says sarcastically from the door way chuckling, as I struggle to chew and swallow.

"Wow you're so funny, hahaha" I say monotonous while I grab two cups from the cupboard.

I fill them with ice while he grabs a pitcher of lemonade out the fridge and pours some into each cup.

"I know right" he says as he puts the lemonade back in the fridge.

"So what are you doing here, you looking for parker" I ask while he sips his lemonade.

"Actually I came to talk to you" he says his facial features turning serious.

"What about"

"Well I'm going back to Lincoln High tomorrow ,and since I know you don't have a ride. Do you want to ride with me" he asks staring into my eyes.

"I actually ride with my Derek" I say looking at the melting ice on my cup.

"Oh yeah"

"Speaking of him, he was able to forgive me" I say forcing a smile.

"Then why do look like somethings's bothering you"

"It's just under one condition...I can't hang out with you anymore" I say looking at my hands.

"So let me get this straight, you're letting some guy you've only known for a year boss you around and tell you, that you can't hang out with your childhood bestfriend" He says looking irritated.

"Well to be fair you haven't been around for years"

"Okay Rachel I get I left but I still knew you my whole life, just because I left doesn't mean all memories of you I before then are erased"

"I know but s-"

"No, I'm so tired of you throwing that in my face if I could go back in time and change it I would"

"Niall...I-"

"Actually you know what, fine. When we're at school I don't know you and you don't know me. He says placing his cup down and walking to the door right as Parker stumbles in laughing.

"Hey dude what's up"

But Niall walks right past him and shuts the front door.

"What have you done now" he asks crossing his arms and narrowing his eyes at me.

"well.." I say dragging out the word trying to figure out if I want to tell him the truth or lie,but I don't like lying plus I figure Niall will tell him later anyways.

"Derek told me he'll forgive me.."

"That's great-"

"But only if I cut Niall off completely"

"That bastard, who does he think he is..wait did you actually agree to it" he says narrowing his eyes at me once again.

"Yes, but hear me out"

"Rachel, I can't believe you"

"Just hear me out"

"I'm all ears"

"Well I figured since I've been dating Derek for a year and haven't seen Niall in like three' that the best choice would be Derek"

"Rach have you checked instagram lately"

"No why"

"Go look at Derek's account, since suddenly he comes before lifelong friends" He says going up to his room.

I go grab my phone nervously, not knowing what to expect. I log into instagram and type in his name and the last picture I see was five minutes ago and it's him and some girl. There's no caption but it's him sitting on his bed while someone takes the picture beside him, but on the wall beside him you can see the shadow of a girl. I can't help but look at the pic very long wondering if I'm reading too deep into this and should go to bed or go to his house and break up their little session. I pick the first one because it's too late to fight. But I'll have plenty of time tomorrow. So I start getting read to go to bed early so I can be ready for tomorrow. It's gonna be a long day!

Authors Note:

Do you think Rachel's overreacting? Or do you think Derek is up to some shady shit? And how do you feel about niall blowing up earlier, do you think he deserved to, or do you think he deserves all the anger she still has towards him leaving?

Love you guys I know I haven't wrote in a long time but im trying to get my shit together and change that, and im sorry if you dont like the cursing but keep in mind Rachel and mostly everyone in this book are teens or adults but I can tone it down if it's reall disturbing y'all the last thing i want to do is offend or disturb anyone <3 L