Size Of The Moon (Phan Fic)

Chapter 1

Phil's POV

"Stop the car, dad!" I screeched as I saw total lost of control on the drivers seat.

I wish I could say this never happened before. That my father never put his, as well as my own life in danger from situations like this. But that would be a lie, and I've gone use to it.

"Calm down Philip! We - we're almost there" he spat the same word I hear every time this happens. I've learn the meaning of them time ago. I don't care about anything, anymore.

"Why don't you - you just park here and - and I'll walk home, or... if you like I - I could drive" I stuttered knowing the aftermath of my comment.

"Why don't - don't you just SHUT THE HELL UP!" with a slap in the face as he took both hand of the steering weal causing the car to jullt around to the other side of the rode, heading to the pavement. Luckily there were no people walking around London at three in the morning. After another gulp of his alcohol, he took control of the steering weal again and continued our drive home.

"It's your - your fault I'm like this. That - that I have to drink every time I have to look at... at your face." He spooked silently enough for me to hear.

I know exactly why he drank. He wasn't always like this to be honest. It started nine years ago, after my mother passed away.

We where coming home from a business party my father had with his high class and long time friends, I know them well. Everybody there kept complimenting us, especially my mother. The one thing I remember most was hearing "Oh look at you Philip, you've grown to look so much like your father. But you have your mothers eyes." I miss those eyes.

My mother was tiered and they decided it was time to go home, it was around midnight. My parents in front of me as I sat in the middle back seat. My father placed his hand on top of my mother's, which was above her pregnant belly. He looked so happy, gazing at her direction, lovingly.

When out of nowhere I spotted large bright headlights coming from ahead. He also noticed, but it was to late. The impact of the six wealer was so powerful that it knocked me into a coma for a month, and in critical conditions, with scares around my body.

My father was in even worries conditions that the hospital had to keep him longer. But my mother and unborn brother didn't survive and died with the impact. I was only nine.

So now my father couldn't fined any other reason, other then to blame me from not warning him strait away before the coalition, to not ruin his life, with me in it. And I let him, because in times like this, I wish I would have died.

"I'm sorry" is all I could say looking down, knowing well enough that he wouldn't care about anything that I had left to say.

"Yes Philip, me too" he said in the same toon he always uses with me.

The drive was more calm and quiet after, and soon we arrived to the home I grow up in. The front yard used to be filled with flowers all around the fences, and the pathway to the front door, but now is filled with dead grass.

"Go to bed now" he said with a firm grip on the steering weal, not wanting to look at me, his glasses falling to the tip of his nose.

"Okay, night dad" I said silently as I quickly open the door and headed for the house, closing the door behind me. Once I reached the front door and was about to turn the key to unlock it, I looked back at my dad. He berried his head in his hands on the steering weal. Soon I heard quiet sobs come from the car ten feet away.

I couldn't handle it anymore and furiously opened the door as tears slid down my warm check were he had slapped me. I closed it and leaned against it as the tears continued to flow out. After a wail I slid down with my kness against my chest. I turned to the left where a portrait of my mother and I hangs. Why dose this always happen? Why didn't I just die instead of you? I miss you so much. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry ... this IS all my fault. I didn't want to move, I was in to deep now and to tiered to get up, but it don't matter because he would probably stay in the car the whole night, like the other times. I laid down and after two minutes I was out of this painfully reality and into a deep sleep on the floor.

~

I opened my eyes in confusion to were I was as the sunshine hit my face threw the long windows on each side of the door. Starring at the ceiling I finally remembered what happened and quickly sat up. As I got up I stretched my cramped and achy body from the uncomfortable position I sleped in. I walked lifelessly up the stares to my room. Planing to jump strait to bed I noticed the time. 7:12 Oh God Oh God I'm late.

I quickly changed out of yesterday's clothes and into clean once from my closet. I garbed my phone out of my jeans just to realize it was dead. Great. Walking out my room I quickly took my backpack and put my shoes on. As I headed out the front door I noticed nether my dad nor his car were anywhere in sight. I ran to my car and quickly started driving out the street. Telling myself that he just went to work early or something.

School is about an hour away walking, so driving was about twenty minutes away. So I was pretty fucked. Almost arriving, I pulled up to a frantic stop in front of the gates to the school's parking lot, to a guy walked incautiously between me and the entrains. The fuck is this guys problem?

I honked capturing the idiots attention. Without hesitation he flipped me off, not looking up once at me. I clenched on the weal, glaring as he passed by not taking his eyes of the ground. Okay, calm down Phil.

The guy reached the front door to the schools entrains, as I found a place to park, he stopped his past and stared at the door. It looked like he was waiting for something to happen, with his hands hung loosely in the pocket of his leather jacket. I saw all of this throw the rear view mirror. After a moment of gathering my thoughts, I decided to head to what was left of my first lessen.

I slammed the door after grabbing my things, hared enough for the guy to hear. He turned, facing my was, as I headed tours his direction. For a second our eyes meat. His eyes widened before he quickly turned and walked in. Dame, what's this guys problem?