The King Who Loved Me

Chapter 25

I watch his face change to shock. My heart is thumping so loudly and furiously in my chest, I am sure he can hear it. He doesn't say anything, just approached the window and stares out over the moonlit gardens. "Say something please" I beg.

"Does your husband know?" He asked

"No, and I intend to keep it that way" I add hugging my arms around myself. "James, I'm sorry" I whispered looking down.

"You have nothing to apologise for. I don't regret our night either. It just upsets me that my first and only child born from the woman I love, will not see me as their father" he's looking at me now, straight in the eyes.

My heart clenched painfully. "I want you to choose the name. If it be girl or boy. I want to think of you when I see our child. They will always be our child James. No-one, not even Luke can take that away from you" I smile caressing his cheek. He turns his chin and pressed a soft, gentle kiss on my palm.

"I must go." He smiles walking away as quickly as he came.

King James Point of View

I was a father of a child that isn't mine. I want to be able to teach him to be a good king, and how to hold a sword right. I wanted to teach her to love, to hold a sword with both hands and slay nasty dragons. I wanted my child to go to sleep with the attention I never got as a child from my father.

But I couldn't. She wasn't mine. The child isn't my responsibility. As I stride into the dinner hall I approach my trusted advisor "Fetch me the Spanish princess" I had avoided her for much too long. I had to meet my fiancé.

I stare at my cousin from across the room hoping he would mess up, return to his old ways of flirting with women. Taking them to bed. I was surprised his notorious reputation never reached the ears of his bride. Who would tell her? Not I, she detested me at the time and would just see me as trying to break up the marriage.

"You summoned me your majesty" she bows. The first thing I noticed about her was her skinny black hair tucked into a simple bun. I had the edge to untie it and let it free. Her dress pushed her breasts up and a corset defined her curvy body. This woman oozed femininity.

"Yes, I apologize. I only wanted to make sure you were properly settled in without the stresses of a formal introduction" I lie.

"How considerate of you my lord" she smiled happily.

"Please, call me James. After all, we are to be husband and wife soon" I push in. She would serve as a good distraction from Elenore.

"Call me Rosetta. I must say your palace is beautiful." She smiles.

I admire her for a moment "I am glad, but please if you have any decorations that you would like to add. I want you to feel free to do as you please, I want this to be your home as much as it is mine." I smile.

"Your too kind James." She blushes. I had to admit, despite my heart's reluctance to move on. She was beautiful and innocent and kind. "Perhaps, if you are not too busy, we can spend tomorrow afternoon together. And discuss details. Father seems quite urgent in his wish for us to wed soon." She smiles.

"Of course. As am I. I think an alliance between England and Spain will benefit us both." I extend her arm and walk around the room making introductions.

I noticed my cousin at the start of the dinner. But he left quickly after course two claiming his wife was sick. Shame fills my full stomach, oh his flirting with women as his wife lay sick.

I felt guilty as I had gone in there and shouted at her. When she has been nothing but understanding and considerate of me. She was carrying my child, letting me name it and agreeing to be my mistress and now my friend. More than I deserved.

And all I could be to her was a selfish king. "Excuse me" I announce quickly standing up to leave the room.

I don't remember what I do next, all I remember is bringing the whiskey bottle to my lips, drowning away the pain.

"You worthless piece of sh*t" I grumble at myself before launching the bottle at the wall across from me. The Wall deciding my Chambers from Elenore.

Emotions always came in strong rushes to me, and in my life. Normally I could just close them down and turn them off. But lately, my heart had come too far up, clinging to my sleeve. And now it was being shattered all over again. The hope clings to is my driving force for anything I do. And now with it shattered. My country needing guidance.

I found myself as a small boy again waiting for someone to take care of him. Rosetta seemed nice enough. But she wasn't Elenore. She wasn't the mother of his child. And she wasn't the first woman he had fallen hopelessly in love with.

The knocking came from the door. I dare not move. I didn't need anyone seeing me like this. "James open up, I know you're there" her voice sung, sucking strongly on my heartstrings.

The door opened. And Elenore looked around the room for damage, noticing the broken base and it spilt content. The room stank of alcohol. "What's wrong James?" She asked closing the door moving closer to me. "Are you. are you drunk?" She asks waking closer.

I shake my head. "No. I'm not" I whisper.

"Good. Come let's get you to bed." She smiled softly taking my hand. Leading me to my bed. She pulls down the sheets and kneels down as I sit. Pulling my boots off. And placing them to the side. She stands up and unties my jackets and medallions placing them on the side table. "In you get" she states softly before tucking me in.

"I'm going to get the maid to remove that horrible stuff. I don't want you drinking it. I was so worried that you had hurt yourself... Or worse" she blabbered. "I heard and jumped up, I had to know that you were alright. You are alright?" She asked quickly

"I am. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry" somehow that didn't seem like enough.

"Rest up. I want to hear the names you come up with tomorrow morning." She kisses my forehead. Just like my mother used to.

"Luke?" I asked following her walking figure.

"I told him. I needed to talk to my mother before she went to bed and get something to stop the sickness" her head tilted slightly almost as if she was lost in thought.

"I hope you feel better. If there is anything I can do. Tell me. Please" I whisper not even sure she can hear me.

I don't hear a response as I drift asleep. Waking up with an ache, I open my eyes to find myself sitting on the floor by the heath of the fire. The clothes from the day before strapped onto me. The broken glass laying on the foot of the opposite wall. It was a dream, a stupid dream.