Hamilton shortstories / Writing Prompts

The Step Ladder

It was true, to the finest degree, that indeed every cabinet meeting was a full-on rumble. Irrelevant chit chat among the herd of middle-aged men kept the room alive with jeers of hatred and crude jokes. A look of impatience grew across Washington's face as he looked across the sea of childlike excitement before him, as he was sat at the head of the vast table. He clenched his hand into a fist, then released it as if it were some type of stress relief, letting out a sigh through gritted teeth.

He was about to shout to bring the room to silence when the sound of metal screeching against the mahogany floors brought the room to a long-awaited peace. Hamilton had finally arrived, and there in his grasp was a metal step ladder. He placed it next to him before taking a seat near the head of the table with a few buddies within the cabinet.

"Alexander... What the devil are you doing?" Washington queried, pressing two fingers against his temples to soothe a headache he had accumulated after the ruckus.

A grin appeared on Alexander's usually pursed lips, "This, my good friend, is a step ladder." He gestured towards the ladder to the left of him, "It even has rubber steps!" He smiled wider, trying to hide his evident glee.

"Whatever makes you happy Alexander, just don't scratch my floors." Washington exhaled, finally giving into his shenanigans. This was the most untoward thing he had done since attempting to replace every member of congress with a stuffed animal which he claimed "matched their personality;" Jefferson, obviously, got a giraffe.

The silhouette of Thomas peered over Alexander as he took a seat, dead opposite of him at the same table.

"Good day to you, Sir." Was all he said, taking a sip of clear water which was poured into dainty glasses for all the people who had decided to show up.

"And to you," Washington replied, standing up and pressing his papers against the desk to make them straight.

"Ladies and gentlemen, you could've been anywhere in the world tonight but you're here with us in New York City! Are you ready for a Cabinet meeting?" He asked, an assortment of "Hell yes"'s and cheers erupting from the room like a volcano.

"Settle down, now. The issue on the table; Secretary Hamilton's plan to assume states debts and establish a national bank. Secretary Jefferson, you have the floor, Sir."

Jefferson stood up, clearing his throat with a loud, obnoxious cough. Inhaling, he opened his mouth to speak, "Life liberty, in the pursuit of happiness-" He began, being cut off by the ear-piercing sound of metal scraping the floors. Alexander stood, looming above Jefferson at the height of 7ft, with his step ladder. Jefferson's eyes travelled up his body until they finally met his eyes.

"These are wise words enterprising men-" He continued, being cut off once again by more shrill screeches. Hamilton had adjusted the step ladder so that he was nearly 8ft taller than him, hardly being able to balance his weight on top of it.

"Are you done now, Alexander?" Thomas asked, grinding his teeth together in frustration.

Alexander nodded, "Sure. Whatever you say." He grinned wider, looking down at Jefferson.

"Ohh, but Hamilton forgets, his plan would have the government assume the State's debts. Now place your bets as to who that benefits..- The very seat of government where Hamilton sits!" He shouted, pointing his cane at Alexander in a flamboyant manner.

"Not true!" Alexander shouted in protest, sticking his right arm out to point at Jefferson, who by now was over 2ft below him. The shift in weight had been enough to change the balance keeping the ladder upright, and it began to shake.

"Oh no, no, no..." Was all Alexander could mumble before toppling off the ladder, landing on the table with a loud thud. About five drinks had been spilled, ruining the notes both Jefferson and Alexander had put together. In an attempt to break the fall, Alexander had reached his hands out and clutched them around Jefferson's shoulders, however, this only resulted in him joining the fall with him.

Alexander rolled over onto his stomach, looking at a rather dazed Thomas Jefferson before him. Jefferson pushed himself off the table and regained his posture, "Alexander I swear you need to be banned from Cabinet meetings..."

"Thomas you need to be banned from the public in general." He whined, slinking off the table and back into his seat.