and BAM! a wild update appears!
The response to the first part of this story is pretty overwhelming so I figured I owed you guys something. So here is a semi-edited update. Parts of it I have had written for months and have read over and edited it time and time again. While some parts I wrote today and I haven't had the chance to read over and edit it time and time again like I most likely will.
and since I am so generous you can have some Elvis Presley too ;) Seriously though... Elvis isn't Elvis ridiculously talented? It doesn't hurt that hes a babe (or Hunk of Burning Love) either. I wish I was born in the same generation as he was. I have been to Graceland though and am returning this summer. Its super dope. There might be a fan-fic for Elvis coming from me soon. :3
Sorry about that Elvis rant... here's the chapter.
*Sixteen Weeks Pregnant*
It had been two weeks since we met with Dr. Bening and learned I had not one, but two little boys growing inside me. It had only been a week since Jeff left to go touring with TNA. We made the most of our time together, but when it came down to watching him leave, I was shattered. I was expecting for it to be painful to watch Jeff walk onto that plane and not go with him, but it was far worse than I anticipated. It nearly knocked the breath out of me and I felt like someone punched a hole through my chest. I shed a single tear as I struggled to walk away from gate he just left through, when all of my instincts told me to buy a ticket and go with him.
After the first day without him I reverted to my old ways. It wasn’t surprising that the dreams came back, but what I wasn’t anticipating was everything else coming back too. All of my extremely socially awkward quirks had returned. I again feared physical contact from everyone so I holed myself up inside this huge house that seems so empty. The only good thing about being holed up in here is that I had a long while to think about baby names. I had been looking at names and their meanings lately and that’s how I picked the second name. The name was Alexander Miles Hardy. Alexander means ‘defender of the people’ and Miles means ‘soldier.’ The meaning of his brother’s name, Aiden Dakota, was a little more timid and I felt he would be the peace keeper; Aiden meant ‘little fire’ and Dakota means ‘the allies.’
Currently I was sitting in my driveway, having just gotten home from the grocery store, and I dreaded walking into my home. I knew even if my home was small, which it wasn’t, it always feels so empty without Jeff around. It would have been foolish if I never expect Jeff to start wrestling again, not to mention selfish. I really did want him to start wrestling, but I didn’t expect to find out I am pregnant about a month before he left. I had always wanted to have a family, and to start one with Jeff of all people was thrilling, but talk about bad timing.
Amy said I am depressed, and she is probably right. I am no stranger to depression so I know how it would feel if I were. I think my current state of depression stems from how I let myself become very reliant on Jeff without even meaning to. I just don’t know what to do without him by my side… I feel like my whole world just stopped. Everything once special to me now held no significance without Jeff to share them with. Sunrises were once my only means of hope but now it's just a reminder of a new day without Jeff. Not to mention the music we both listened to sounded so foreign without Jeff sitting next to me, signing every line. I feel like my world had lost its light… I hadn’t lost it though, it’s was just in another state.
I opened my car door and held onto the door frame to help steady myself as I slipped down from the tall SUV. Unintentionally, I slammed the car door and walked around to the trunk where my grocery bag is. I opened the trunk and pulled out the large brown paper bag filled with food before closing the trunk.I walked to the door and noticed a red envelope on the ground, I must have dropped it when i grabbed the mail this morning. I walked into the kitchen and put both the grocery bag and my purse on the kitchen table before goingto retrieve the red envelope. There was no return adress on it, only my name written in large letters on the red paper.
