Bartending Isn't Hard

Chapter 1: Usual Living

She watches with the most curious eyes as a boisterous woman waddles into the bar, only to leave back out. She's confused momentarily before a man comes back to the bar with a drunken mumble for more whiskey. She fills his glass up and really just considers giving him the whole bottle because he's making a clear attempt at getting plastered by himself. Maybe she should go talk to him, ask him if anything's wrong, but she really doesn't care that much. She doesn't even want to blow her cover because she's a bartender at the meek age of 18. Her boss thinks she's 21 and she never corrected him. She makes good drinks, for when he actually comes out of his office to get one, and she's sweet so business is great.

("Why's your name Tyler?" "My mom is one of two people that thinks it's a unisex name. My sister's name is Delany, so she didn't really get the same treatment." "Hmm, interesting. I like you, Tyler, you're hired. You old enough to bartend?" "Depends on if you care about laws." "Well, you're going to bartend. Cool?" "Swell.")

Now, Tyler's working at the oddest bar she's ever been a part of. Her boss, she's pretty sure, is a nymphomaniac. She's seen him with both men and women, but he's taken a particular liking to a man named Ryley. Ryley looks years longer than him, at least a decade, but it's not in her place to question it. He might actually be at little older than her, at maybe 22, and her boss is 32. Speaking of which, here he comes.

"Mr. Starling." Tyler beams at him and he gives a half-assed smile back. She still tries with him because she likes him and just knows how he is. She's been here for some months and learned that he's easy to read.

"Heeey. Can I get a water on the rocks?" He slinks over to the bar and just leans on it. He's been drinking when she's not here.

"Agh, it's water. Just say ice, weirdo." Tyler frowns at him, hating his professionalism, and he snorts, gripping his head soon afterwards. Serves him right.

"Can I just have my water?" Mr. Starling practically whines and she takes mercy on him, sliding the water over to him. He finally actually looks at her and she blinks.

"What?"

"Your hair is adorable." He reaches over to ruffle her hair and she lets him. She doesn't mind being touched but it's just weird to her because he's her boss. She's used to shoulder patting and high fiving, not hair ruffles. Sometimes, she feels like his adopted daughter. Her heritage wouldn't exactly scream relation. But, today, she wrangled her afro into two puffballs.

"Thank you. It's black girls' natural hair version of pigtails, really." Tyler shrugs and he chuckles, nodding and going back into his office. She calls after him, "Have Ryley come take care of you!"

"You have the best ideas, Tyler!" He calls back before audibly groaning and shutting the door behind him. She laughs a bit and pours herself a glass of orange juice. She may work at a bar, but she doesn't drink. She's still not allowed and she actually likes her liver. The man from before with the constant whiskey refills slides back over and waves with two fingers, "Yo."

"You want some more whiskey?" Tyler looks at him and he shakes his head drunkenly, laying his head on the counter. She finishes refilling a wine glass and the woman walks away singing cheerfully about how the nice bartender refilled her glass, so she goes over to Jack Daniels™.

"Soo, Mr. Daniels? Do you need something? A Gatorade? Or an Ibuprofen? A bed?" She watches him and he shakes his head again.

"My last name isn't Daniels?" He sounds so unsure and out-of-it.

"Are you sure? You're drinking all the whiskey, so I just assumed you were the famed Jack Daniels, who should be dead by now." She teases and he pouts at her drunkenly, trying so hard to focus on her face before he gives up and lays his head back down. He seems harmless enough so she pats his head and gives him a makeshift icepack. He mumbles something appreciatively and she goes back to tending other customers until she sees Ryley walk in with just a shirt on, what the hell?

"Heey, Tyler." Ryley waves to her and she waves back to him, adjusting her glasses.

"What the hell do you not have on? You literally only have on a shirt and shoes, that's really pushing the bar rules here." She snorts, looking over his outfit again and he comes over to the counter, beckoning her closer so he wouldn't have to lean over as much.

"This is what Victor made me come in." Ryley whispers, embarrassed written all over his olive skin. Tyler chuckles and shakes her head.

"You ain't gotta let him push you around like that." Tyler scolds and Ryley pouts at her. "Stop that, it's cute."

"But, I actually kinda liked it. This lady was on the bus and she was staring and-"

"That's because you barely have on any clothes, Ryley." Tyler hisses and he sinks down with another pout. She sighs and rubs her face once she sees him tearing up, "Sorry, sorry. I just like you a lot and Starling does too."

"So, I have to just completely stop?" Ryley looks at her and she freezes.

"That wasn't even the beginning of my point." Tyler keeps her voice level and calm because Ryley's a sensitive boy and making him cry will get her fussed at. She settles with, "Just be careful, okay? Unless you're with Starling."

"M'kay!" He beams before frowning again, "he said he wanted another water too."

"Uh, I think he can bring his first glass out here and get a refill. Sharon hates doing too many extra dishes." Tyler waves him off and he goes into Mr. Starling's office excitedly.

Tyler spends some time cleaning up a little before she notices that Jack Daniels™ is still there. Is he asleep? She hopes he's asleep. If someone died in here, the business might either shut down or only attract reality TV ghost hunters. Wine Lady is gone though and is now singing outside. She goes over to him and poke him lightly. He grumbles and she sighs in relief, waving the bouncer over to put him in a bedroom. He'll wake up in the morning, hungover and terrible, and she'll explain to him why he's asleep in a bar. Her go-to is usually, "Mr. Starling runs a bar, he knows how this can go sometimes," and not, "Sometimes Mr. Starling sleeps here with his newest partner instead of going home, but since he's settled on Ryley the rooms have been a lot more open,"

Tyler doesn't believe saying the truth would be bad for business, but Mr. Starling does, because hehas a problem. 

END

A/N: Sollux the Writer is trying her best at third person. I haven't written in third person in 8,000 years. It's gonna be an attempt. This is based on a comic that you will only find out about if you ask about it .-. - Sollux the Writer