A Story Of A Kontrabida

4: Everyone are Against me

I gently closed our living room door and try my best not to create any noise but the living room light up and I saw the woman who I want to avoid forever. I look away and avoid her gaze and was about to pass her but I stop from walking after hearing what she said.

"Are you a prostitute?" The words just made my heart crash. Hearing it from your mother is totally suicidal. I just closed my eyes and sigh.

"Look at yourself, are you trying to sell your body?" My hand turned into fist trying to stop my tear. Hindi ako umimik at nagpatuloy na lamang sa paglalakad.

"Bakit pa ba kasi ikaw ang nabuhay? Bakit hindi nalang kasi ang kapatid mo? You are such a torn in this family!" I closed my eyes again as tears flows down on my cheeks. Nobody loves me in this world, ni sarili kong ina ay hindi ako gusto what a nice life right? Padabog kong isinarado ang pinto at umupo sa kama ko pero napalingon ako sa pinto nang bigla itong bumukas. What now? Hindi pa ba siya tapos sa masasama niyang salita tungkol sa akin?

"I'm not yet done with you! How dare you to turn your back at me?!" Tinitigan ko siya sa mata, she never treated me like a daughter and she's always blaming me about the loss of my twin.

"It's not my fault! I don't know why she lost! Why are you always asking me about Angel who died 10 years ago?!" I yelled but immediately stop when a hand landed on my face. It was so damn aloud that it made a strong impact to my face.

"S-she's not dead. Wag na wag mong masabi sabi na patay na si Angel!" She said before she open the door to exit. No, she's dead. Why can't she die on their mind? I want to tell them that Angel is already dead and they should move on. Gusto kong magmakaawa sa kanila na ako nalang 'yung bigyan nila ng oras kesa sa taong matagal ng patay.

"No. She's dead because I killed her." I said in a low voice. I want to call her and ask her to tell our parents that she's already dead and they should focus on me instead of her. I envy her so much because even though she's dead, our parents always care for her and bring her food in her room. Sana ako nalang yung nawala, sana ako nalang yung nasagasaan para maramdaman ko rin yung feeling na may nagmamahal sa akin.

°°°

Daretso lang akong umupo sa hapag-kainan without glancing my mother and father. Sumubo ako ng walang lunok-lunok at kung mapupuno na ang bibig ko ay tsaka lamang ako iinom ng tubig upang malunok iyon. If you are asking if I am like this whenever I'm eating with my parents, well yes. Ganito ako sa harapan ng parents ko kumain, hindi ko masisisi ang sarili ko. Psychology said that if the person eats in an abnormal manner, he/she is tense and I am tense all the time in front of them and who wouldn't be? My parents are blaming me about anything in life, they will yell at me whenever I did something wrong, big things or small things. That's what my life here in our house, hell.

After I have done my suicidal breakfast, I immediately run unto our car and call the driver to convey me to my school. I exhaled deeply as the car leak on our gate, I always like this whenever I am not in that hell house anymore. It's like I have been free from hell that have been trying to kill me everyday.

"Ang lakas ng buntong hininga niyo ma'am ah?" I look at manong Jepoy who was smiling at me in the front mirror.

"Just drive the car." I said glaring at him in the front mirror but instead of avoiding my gaze, he smiled at me.

"Okay lang po yan ma'am, magiging maayos din ang lahat. Marami pong nagmamahal sa inyo." I rolled my eyes and averted my gaze outside. That line is the most annoying and useless line in the whole world. How can they say, it's okay and everything will be fine? How, and I will apply it immediately.

°°°

"What?" I said angrily to our teacher when she told me to go in the dean's office. Why would I needed there? I did nothing--oh well for me I have been doing good things. Good things for myself.

"Just come." Palihim kong inirap ang mata ko and I glared at my classmates who are gossiping about the things that I have done and the reason why the dean is calling for me.

"Bitches, I can hear your gossips. Mouth off or I'll destroy your ugly faces." I said and went to the dean's office. Pagdating ko 'dun ay nakita ko ang magang mata ni Kitty and Veejay's blank expression. Oh God, so this Kitty girl here have complaints.

"What is it?" I said without any fears.

The dean gently hold her eyeglass to fix it while looking at me from head to toe. I close my eyes and swallowed because of the thought that this dean is my Tita. I sit down in the vacant chair without glancing one of them. She sigh before she look at Kitty, her eyes are swelling and I mentally laugh. I wonder what happened after I left them there, oh well none of my business anymore.

"So mind to tell me what happened and you are in the club last night?" She said in a firm, full of authority and freackish tone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, her we go again with her words, most of the students here are scared of her but sorry to say that I am not one of them.

"Excuse me? I don't know that the dean is a gossip mongers. So mind to tell me MA'AM if where did you heard that?" Her brows draw near and she gave me an angry look. Oh so scary, tsk.

"Ms. Montez, where's your manners?" She said and cleared her throat before she intertwined her fingers and look to the two people beside me.

"So the three of you are on the club last night, right?" She raised her brow and the three of us look to each other. We did not answered the dean who are waiting for our answers but we averted our gaze to her again when he toss a picture. A picture of Veejay when he was punching a guy, a picture of Kitty when someone is kissing her on her neck and a picture of me drinking. I sighed in relief, I was relief na yan lang ang nakitaan sa akin at mukhang hindi naman iyon ganun kalaswa but I admit that I wore a flirty dress that night but who cares? Its because her dress is flirty doesn't mean she is really a flirt.

"So care to explain that pictures?" I saw Kitty's teary eyes and Veejay immediately held her hand to comfort her. Pagbaliin ko kaya yang mga kamay nila?

"I did go to the club." I said as I lean in my chair and cross my legs and arms. There's no use of lying anyway. Maldita ako but not a lier.

"It's Bianca's fault, she lured Kitty and she even set up the whole scene." Veejay said and I look at him with wrinkled brows. His words just jab my whole, nalason na ba talaga ang isip niya sa babaeng 'yan?

"What are you talking about? So you are blaming me about what happened?" I asked, he look at my eyes with rage.

"Kung hindi mo sinama si Kitty sa club na 'yun, hindi sana mangyayari 'to! You even send this pictures to ruin our reputation. Are you that desperate?" I bit my lower lip to stop my tears. His words are too sharp. No, I just felt like he don't care about me anymore and all he care is to protect that girl beside him. Wala pala silang pinagkaiba kay Mom at Dad, they are all the same.

"I did not send that pictures. I don't know what are you talking about, kung magbibigay ako ng picture ay hindi ko idadamay ang sarili ko. And Kitty, sinama ko siya but it's her fault. Hindi ko sinabing maglasing siya at sumayaw siya sa dance floor ng parang baliw, kusa siyang sumayaw. Do you get me Veejay? 'Wag mong iparatang sa akin ang sarili niyong kasalanan." Umiling-iling siya at nagtiimbaga.

"Stop lying Bianca. I know that the guy last night is your ally. Sinet-up mo kami." I was about to speak but the dean intermit.

"Enough." Natahimik kami at ibinaling naman ng dean ang tingin niya sa akin. "Is it true Bianca?" I shook my head.

"No. I just invited Kitty to drink but the guy who kissed her is out of my control, I don't even know him." I said and she stared at me, trying to figure out if I'm lying.

"I doubt that. I know you and your actions, your parents must know this thing." I stared at her. She is now dialing my parents phone number and I can't do anything to make them believe me. Yeah. Everyone are against of me.