Sober

It's been a while since I thought about you

I sighed, swirling the water, watching the little ice cubes float around in the slim glass.

It's been a while, have you thought about me too?

I stare at my nails, wondering what you're up to.

I'm meeting her at the place that we used to

My foot taps the side of the barstool I'm sitting on, glancing at my watch.

It's been a while since I thought about you

A pang hit my heart as I realised you had probably forgotten about me by now.

God, she almost looks like you in the dark

The colourful lights cut through the darkness, the bass notes thumping.

Sitting in the same corner at the bar

She smiles at me, long black hair.

Yeah, we took so many shots we went too hard

I smile fondly internally at the memory, making sure she doesn't see.

God, she almost looks like you in the dark

The club's shrouded in darkness, so dark that I almost mistake her for you.

She ordered a drink before I could notice

I freeze, watching her hand gesture for the bartender.

That Jack and Coke brought us into focus

She slides the cocktail towards me, and I force a smile onto my face.

I took a sip, it tasted just like it used to

It hurt. It hurt to remember the memories again.

It's been a while since I thought about you

Tears welled up in my eyes, but I quickly wiped them away delicately before she could notice.

I wouldn't say it sober

I can feel myself getting slightly tipsy.

But the truth is coming out

My head hurts.

I didn't miss you until now, until now

Another memory flashed by. We were sitting at the exact spot, laughing and leaning on each other.

In my right mind, it's over

I shook my head, tears blurring my vision.

But the drinks are talking loud

I forced myself to push back the truth.

I didn't miss you until now, until now

"We're no longer together, stop wishing it was real."

Being here without you doesn't feel right

I smile awkwardly at her.

Her lips are moving and I'm tryna be too nice

I nod now and then, pretending to listen.

She's looking at me but she doesn't have your eyes

Your green galaxy eyes replace her warm blue eyes for a second, before fading back into blue.

Being here without you doesn't feel right

I fiddle with my phone, turning it back on and off, the time slowly ticking by.

Your song just came on and now it feels hopeless

The song changes, and I gulp.

Jukebox is playing old Guns 'N Roses

Too many memories are washing up.

I put a dollar in it just like you used to

Standing, I ignore her and walk over to it, slipping a dollar into it.

It's been a while since I thought about you

As the song begins to play, I feel little wall that's been built ever since we broke up start to crumble, bit by bit.

I wouldn't say it sober

I slide to the floor, sobbing quietly.

But the truth is coming out

I feel a pair of warm hands grasp my shoulder. I let her stay with me, let her help me cope with the pain.

I didn't miss you until now, until now

She didn't deserve a wreck like me, didn't need to spend a night at a club with emotional me.

In my right mind, it's over

I turn and bury my face into her jacket, sobs wracking my body.

But the drinks are talking loud

She smooths my hair softly, rocking me back and forth.

I didn't miss you until now, until now

I miss you so much Laur, but it's time to let go.