Destiny is some Weird Shit

I met drunk Flynn Rider

I woke up at midnight to the sound of birds chirping and warm sunshine. Loooollll. Very funny of me. I actually woke up to the sound of dogs barking and a drunk guy that was singing the opening theme of SpongeBob SquarePants.(I know that's he's drunk because no sober person would do that in the middle of the night. But if any of you do then that's weird.)
I decided to ignore it but the guy just kept singing even louder than before. So I decided to shut him up. I went to the window and shouted," Listen here you idiot! I'm trying to f***ing sleep! So can just stop singing! I'll get a hangover tomorrow morning from your annoying screaming instead of you!"

The streetlights allowed me to see his yellow hat and red shirt. Fortunately, he stopped his singing. Unfortunately, the bastard started singing something else, "You don't own me. I'm not one of your many toys. You don't own me-"

" Just shut the f*** up! And this song isn't made a guy to sing, it's more for girls to sing!"

" Don't tell me what to do! And don't tell me what to say! Please, when I go-"

I threw at him the first thing that came to my hand. A bowling ball. Don't even ask why I have it in my apartment. It landed a couple of inches ahead of him.

" Oh my God! Are you crazy! You could've killed me!"

" If that would make you shut up then why not!" I replied and went to my bed.

The drunk guy stopped his annoying singing. And I finally could sleep. But I couldn't because some jerk decided to knock on my door at midnight. I looked through the peephole and saw that it was the same drunk guy. I grabbed my phone and dialed 911 just in case anything happened. I made sure the door chain was set and opened the door.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"You have a beautiful voice that matches your beautiful face!" He said.

This dude is high, on cloud ninety hundred. That's the most weirdest or creepiest thing I've ever heard. And how can he know that I have a beautiful voice, when I was literally just shouting like a gorilla that was giving birth to a chimpanzee...Anyways, now that I take a good look at him he isn't that bad too. He had dirty blonde hair and ocean blue eyes.

" I must say that you're quite cute too."

" Can I stay at your place?"

" Can you stop saying irrational bullshit?"

" I don't think so..."He answered.

" And I don't think that I'll allow you to stay here."

"But why?" He said in a babyish way.

" Because I don't know you! And why don't you go to your own house?"

" My house is faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar awaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-"

" Okay I f***ing get it!"

" So can I stay now?"

" No."

" If you won't let me then I'll get revenge by throwing your bowling ball at your face."

Shit! Will he actually do that! I have my phone in my hand, and I dialed 911 before. But I always want to try the scene where Rapunzel hits Flynn Rider with a pan when he enters the tower. So, as irrational and risky as it may be, I let him in.

" Thank you soooo much!" He said and pulled me into a bear hug.

I managed to not lose my calm,"You're welcome. But can you tell me your name?"

"I'm Flynn Rider!" He shouted.

Wow. I was spooked. Was this just a coincidence or did he read minds and said that? Maybe his name actually is Flynn Rider. If that's so then it sucks. Because my name is Rachel and I live in an apartment that's worser than the old tower in the movie.

" And I'm Rapunzel."

"Really?! Then do I get to marry you at the end?"

"Marry me?" I said as I took his hand and lead him to the kitchen.

"Yeah. That's what happened at the end of the story." Flynn said and sat on a chair.

"But this is just the beginning of the story." I said as I took out the pan.

"I don't want to eat right now. You can return the pan to its place," Flynn said," And so what if it's the beginning?"

"It means that Flynn gets to be knocked down cold by a pan."

"Yeah right. I forgot about that part. It was so funny," Flynn paused,"Wait. You aren't actually going to recreate that scene are you?"

"You bet I am." And then I hit him with the pan.

His head fell on the table and he just stayed motionless.

"But what if he has a pretty bad concussion? Well I don't care. He threatened to throw a bowling ball at me." I said to out loud to myself.

And so, since I don't have Rapunzel's long hair, I looked for a rope and tied him to the chair. His phone dinged in his pocket. I took it out and was delighted that because of the message that was sent, I can now go around through the stuff in his phone.

I know that it's bad, but whatever. Who can say no to knowing what Flynn Rider's real name is. Technically, it's Eugene. But it's not the exact same thing as the story. But if his name is Eugene then know that I'm shouting Illuminati Confirmed as loud as I can with that sound that they put in the background when someone says that.

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Hope you enjoy whatever whatever. I'm amazing and so is unicornzzzzzzzzzzz . Have a good day. And bye. Also check
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