Was it all a dream?

Part 1

It wasn't supposed to end like this, shit it wasn't even supposed to be, whatever this was.

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I glanced down at my left hand, the bathroom light glinting off the engagement ring that sat nestled on my ring finger and glared. I was happy right? This was what I wanted - right? Then why was I here again? Sighing loudly, I looked back at my reflection, catching the marks up and down my neck from our most recent encounter. Ryan, I thought fondly, had a problem with keeping our secret, just that - a secret. Every time I wound up at his hotel room he would always leave his mark, knowing I would just have to hide them. Watching his bright green eyes dull while I covered them always made my stomach lurch with regret.

"Hey, are you ok in there?" His deep voice reverberated from the other side of the bathroom door.

"Yeah just looking at your newest masterpiece." I responded, knowing his gorgeous face held a very smug smirk without even needing to see him.

I met one Ryan Jonathan Kelley a few years back by complete accident. What had started as a funny meeting in a club with friends had lead to us texting almost everyday to our secret meetings. Problem was I was already in a very committed relationship. I loved, still love, my then boyfriend, now fiance, but Ryan, Ryan was something completely different. That night there was an instant connection. That gut feeling when you know a person is supposed to be in your life, that was how I felt with him. I was comfortable with my fiance, but it had taken time, that awkward getting to know each other stage. With Ryan we skipped over all that, we knew what the other was going to say before they did, it was just that 'right' feeling.

"Are you ever going to come out?" Ryan voiced, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah, give me another second." I laughed out, before sighing and running my hands through my thoroughly fucked hair.

I managed to tame it to a manageable state and opened the door to the grinning, bright eyed man that had somehow stolen my heart, that wasn't mine to give anymore.

"Took you long enough," he sighed, instantly his muscled arms circled my waist, pulling me flush against his still heated skin.

"You couldn't have missed me that much," I giggled as he pulled a face, "I was only gone for a couple of minutes."

"I haven't seen you in over a month," he argued, playfully, "last time I was in town, you were busy," his voice trailed off, causing his good mood to sour slightly.

The last time Ryan had come back home to LA was after his Con hopping in Europe. I had missed him some kind of terrible, but I had made plans with the girls and our significant others and there was no way I could get out of it without James getting suspicious.

"I'm sorry love," I apologized, running my nose up the underside of his jaw.

"I wish things could be different," he mumbled quietly, before his sour mood disappeared and I was backed into the wall behind me. His lips descending on mine erased all thoughts of anyone but him and our little world.

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"How long are you going to let this keep going on Syd?" Charlie asked from beside me.

We were currently under an umbrella at our usual spot at our favorite bistro.

"I know you love James, but Sydney," Ace said from across me. "we've seen you with Ryan."

I narrowed my eyes at my two best friends, before my sister's southern lilt rose.

"They're right you know," Brook voiced. She had been the most reserved when it came to my affair with Ryan.