Lose Her If You Love Her (Spencer Reid/Criminal Minds/AU)

Chapter 4 - History

*Poppy's POV*

It's been an hour or so since I busted Reidy's 'special' area and wrecked my phone. I had used the station phone to call Josh, in order to borrow his phone, but guess what? The stupid idiot dropped his phone in the nearby river and hasn't got around to getting a new one. So I have no phone now, absolutely brilliant.

But right now, we have nothing to go on apart from the fact that all the vics were connected to me via my...unhealthy childhood. Due to this, Hotchy was making sure that I was watched at all times (his exact wording, trust me) and it was freaking killing me! I had already gone so stir crazy that I had broken several chairs and dented the wall...by throwing one of the chairs at it...yeah, it's only been an hour but so what?

I think the team are starting to get worried about my mental health...already Gideon has stepped up to me and asked me if I am feeling okay or need anything to calm myself down. Hotch replied emotionlessly with 'this is Poppy being calm'. I stood up hit him over the head for that...in return, I am now sitting in the corner, sulking.

*Spencer's POV*

The last hour has been hell. Poppy has already broken three chairs, one of them got thrown at a wall and then denting that wall. Looking at the others, they're feeling the exact same feeling as I am...fear of keeping Poppy cooped up in this building for another hour. To make it worse, Hotch has assigned each of us to keep an eye on her at certain times...and I am the one looking after her the most. I think Morgan's told him that I like her.

Wait.

Did I just say I like her?

Crap.

Looking around now, we're all completely and utterly confused. Well, most of us. Poppy is in her own little world, chattering away to Garcia on facetime. I caught Morgan's eye and nodded in Poppy's direction. Morgan nodded, already answering what I guess he thought I was asking him.

Here goes. "So...Poppy?" 

Poppy immediately looked up and grinned widely at me. Unfortunately, everyone else looked up. "Yes Reidy?"

"I was wondering...Morgan too...what happened earlier?" phew...it's out. Morgan choked and glared at me...oops, don't think that was what he thought I was asking.

Poppy froze. Hotch stood and crossed to her side and patted her head. "Poppy, they're your team. They need to know, in case it...happens again."

Poppy looked up at him, with tears in her eyes. "Are you sure? I mean...they're nice and all...but..."

Hotch smiled encouragingly. "Yes Poppy, you can trust them. I trust them with mine."

Poppy nodded, seemingly pleased. "Okay... here goes." She gulped and then started:

"I had a...troubled childhood. I mean, I was perfectly happy with my brother and my parents. But when I went into high school, things changed. I was bullied...a lot. I hadn't got any friends and every day was filled with mocking insults, physical abuse, you name it. Then one day... I was walking home. I always walked home on my own, even though Josh said he'd walk with me. The only thing was that he was popular and I mean, real popular. He was on the football team, was going out with the hottest girl in school and I was just...me. I refused to let him be seen with me, even though people knew he was my brother, they still made me feel inferior. I couldn't let him see that, so I made him ride home with his girlfriend and their friends. Unfortunately, on that day, it was raining real heavy. I could barely see in front of me, but I still carried on. I was about ten minutes away from my house when I heard it. Josh was yelling. Yelling real loud. For me. I turned around but it was too late. Everything went white. It seems that Josh's mate, Carl Zellney drove his car into me. On purpose. I was in a coma for two months and when I woke up, Carl had been released. His daddy was a strong bloke and bloody terrified the jury. Carl was let out without a record or anything and he almost killed me! Josh had broken up with his girlfriend and left that crowd, that's when he met Hotchy. When I finally went back to school, no one bothered me anymore. Well, I got the hateful glances that's for sure, Rebecca McShaw especially, she was Josh's ex and blamed me for the breakup. Josh wouldn't let anyone near me, he managed to persuade the school to either put me in his classes or him in mine, I was smart so they didn't mind pushing me up a couple grades. Josh practically vetted Hotchy when he met him, Hayley also. Only then were they allowed to come near me. So, as soon as I graduated, I sprung out of Kaplan and Louisiana and sped for Washington, where I started a new life." Poppy stopped and stared at the ground, her shoulders shook.

We were in total silence, shocked that our Poppy had been through so much. Hotchy grimaced and carried on, when he realised Poppy couldnt carry on. "But in Washington... things went wrong. She met someone called Duke Harrison. He charmed her and pulled her into his crowd. He turned out to be less than who he said he was and attempted to rape and murder her. He's now on the run, hence Pops moving a lot. Pops struggles to trust people and believe me, it's hard enough for her to say this much. So if she has one of her fits, please just comfort her and try to calm her down. It's not good for her health if she stays in one for too long. She doesn't generally remember what happens to her during one of her episodes, especially if it's a bad one, so don't bring up the topic that she had reacted to and keep her away from the environment. If I'd have known about this being to do with Poppy's past, then I wouldn't have brought her here." 

We all nodded and smiled sadly at Poppy. 

*Poppy's POV*

I hate this. I hate this feeling of being so lost and helpless. Each and every day, I act as if nothing is wrong, yet I know in the back of my mind that one wrong move and I'm screaming in fear of what Carl and Duke did to me. 

I was deep in thought when something hit me. Not literally, but mentally. Josh had told me who was in the car that day. And guess what? They were all dead.

"Pops? You okay?" Hotchy knelt down and touched my forehead. 

"Hotch...it was them. They were in the car that day, the day I was hit. Excluding Emily, they were all in the car!" I glanced at Hotch in grim horror. "Carl Zellney was driving, Sally Porter was sitting next to him and Rebecca McShaw was sitting in the middle back...it was a 7 seater as Carl liked big cars and he used his dads. Josh was sitting next to Rebecca and...Smith and Frederickson in the back apparently. That's what Josh told me. Hotch, if what I'm thinking's right...then Smith and Frederickson are next!" 

The team sprung into action and Smith and Frederickson were brought into the room. Chiefy was shaking with anger. As soon as the door was closed, Chiefy sprung at them. Again, not literally, but I would not want to be in their shoes.

"You were sitting in Zellney's car when he hit Poppy? Why wasn't I told this?" Chiefy shouted, his face going red.

Smith and Frederickson weren't fazed, they just stood there with a smug look on their faces. Chiefy went wild. "You wipe that smug look off of your face boys, I can easily remove you from the force and I think I will for this. But right now, your sorry little lives are at stake most likely and I think your wives would want you home in one piece instead of in a ditch somewhere praying."

Smith and Frederickson went pale and gaped. "We're in danger?" Smith gulped.

Chiefy nodded. "Because you were in Zellney's damn car you idiots! You cheered him on I bet, you thought it would be so much fun to run over an innocent little girl with her own goddamn brother in the same flipping car!" 

I'm not going to repeat what Chiefy carried on to say...I know my personal dictionary isn't particularly clean, but Chiefy's? Oh no, that's a whole different fire truck.

Smith and Frederickson were assigned protective detail and I made sure Josh was too, I called him to let him know and he flipped, but soon relented and agreed that it was necessary. Now all we had to work on was why Emily was murdered.

~Author's Note~

so sorry for not posting! revising for exams etc, but I'll try to write more!! speak soon :D

Carolyn