Alive ❧ c.yj ♡ p.jh

2《Past》

*Jihyo's POV*

I sat outside Youngjae's hospital room, not daring to get in.

Tears fell from my eyes as I thought about what happened four years ago.

*FLASHBACK*

"Youngjae!" I yelled, running along the river side. "Where are you?"

My phone vibrated, and I immediately pulled it out. It's him. The text read: I'm sorry, Thank you, Goodbye.

I was shaking by then. It was a simple text, but questions filled my mind, and the next thing I saw was him. In the river, unconscious.

Ambulance arrived in no time, but he already stopped breathing. We didn't loose hope. A doctor performed CPR, and his heart functioned again. But his eyes never opened....

END OF FLASHBACK

...until last month.

He hates me now. Is all I can think of.

He wants to die, and he did, twice, but I made him breathe again and again. I'm a selfish person, I know that, but I cant loose him. I just can't.

-

*Youngjae's POV*

why can't I just die? Why did she 'save'me?

Being dead makes me feel alive, but being alive, makes me feel dead.

Breathing is the last thing I want to do. But i can't die here. Not in the hospital. It's not possible. The second I do something to myself doctors and nurses come rushing in. Making me breathe again.

I long for my last breath. But there's still a long way to go before that.

"Youngjae..?" I heard Jihyo say. "Are you okay?"

I didn't reply.

"Youngjae?" She called again.

I let out a soft mumble to show her that I'm there. She walked towards me and pulled the curtains out of her way.

"Why... Why did you do that again?" She asked softly.

"I don't know, I just don't want to breathe again." I sighed. "I don't want to be alive,"

"Would you mind... telling me what happened before I met you? Back in Mokpo?" She looked at me hopefully.

"Sorry. I can't, I'll tell you when the time comes," I assured her, even though I felt really sorry towards her. She deserves to know, but the words doesn't seem to make their way out of my mouth.

After talking for some more, she left to buy me dinner, and all the memories--bad memories--came flowing back.

*Flashback*

"W-what are you guys doing?" I backed off the the corner of the classroom.

"Something we like doing," The leader smirked.

One of the pinned me on the wall, while the others punched me everywhere. It wasn't long before I blacked out.

When I finally opened my eyes in the hospital, I saw a note.

Go back to where you belong,

Don't know where you belong?

Well i'll tell you.

It's hell.

Have a good life, but make sure you go back.

I flipped to the back, and a yellow flower was drawn on it.

A flower that symbolizes death.

After my parents found out about the letter, we moved to Seoul, hoping for a better life.

But those nightmares never left me. The words written on the letter, never left me. The words they spoke, never left. And it's never going to.

I had a rather peaceful life until my parents were killed in an accident, and Jihyo found me, alone in the park.

She comforted me and we did everything together, she really helped me out, a lot. I'm really thankful, but i can't tell her the truth behind all my negative moves and thoughts.

We were doing fine, until one day, I saw one of them again. I didn't have anyone to turn to, so I did what I thought was the best, but Jihyo found me, and brought me back to the cruel world without knowing.

*End of Flashback*

-
Herro
hope no one cried :>
Heh thanks for reading~
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-SoLiA