Three for the City

July: A Step Up

He flopped onto his belly and nearly flipped himself off the couch. Topher’s wool blanket slid down, tangling his legs together and Matt was so frustrated he wanted to scream. He couldn’t, considering it was roughly one in the morning on a Sunday and none of their neighbors deserved any of the fallout from his, Topher’s, and Delia’s earlier argument. Personally, he was impressed they hadn’t called the manager – or the cops – until he’d figured out they’d probably heard worse.

Sighing, he rose up on his elbows and punched his pillow. It was his, as it only vaguely smelled of Topher, and he already considered it lucky Topher had given him the wool blanket instead of his own tie blanket. But that was about as far as Topher’s gratuity extended.

Topher hadn’t emerged from the bedroom for dinner, and Matt had wandered out around ten, some eight or so hours after they’d fought, and found his blanket, phone charger, pillow, toothbrush, and cotton sleep shorts folded neatly in front of the bedroom door. He respected his boyfriend’s retreat, and as much as he wanted to reaffirm that everything was indeed alright – or would be, eventually – he wasn’t allowed into the bedroom. Matt had shared a bathroom with Delia, who was pale and silent, and he knew she was trying to find a way to appeal to her cousin without causing more mayhem.

The cats had taken refuge behind the couch and refused to come out.

His phone lit up from the floor, and, having nothing better to do as he sure as shit wasn’t sleeping anytime soon, Matt reached for the device. It was a Facebook notification for some status he’d liked earlier in the night. The conversation had devolved from what it had been, and he found it more useful to see which of his chat contacts were still online. His thumb hovered over a particular name, and he clicked it, shifting to be able to type with both hands.

Matthew Winchester: Hey Mary. I got a problem. You got a minute?

He looked at the TV, eyes sliding right to look at the bedroom door as best he could. The phone beeped.

Mary Winchester: I always have time for you, little bro. What’s up?

Matthew Winchester: I fucked up. I got scared about shit and I didn’t tell Topher and he found out and he’s pissed.

The little symbol appeared representing that she was typing, and he went back to staring at the dark doorway. Fidget had ventured out in the relative quiet to sit in front of it, tail switching back and forth.

Mary Winchester: What did you get scared about? Your relationship?

Matt sighed. Why was this shit never easy?

Matthew Winchester: No. I’m good with our relationship. I don’t want anybody else, and I didn’t cheat on him. I couldn’t. I wouldn’t and couldn’t and can’t. I’m scared that I’m not going to have enough money, and I don’t want to be dependent on Topher in case I can’t make rent or something. So I didn’t tell him that I was having a hard time looking at the numbers and figuring out what I needed to do to make it work.

Matthew Winchester: He’s loaded and I’m up to my ass in debt and…

Mary Winchester: You freaked.

Matthew Winchester: Majorly.

She was typing again, and Matt watched Fidget bat at the closed bedroom door.

Mary Winchester: The first and most important thing about your student loans is that you don’t default on them. You do that and you’re screwed even more than you already think you are. So, when in doubt about what you can and can’t pay, pay the student loan bill when it comes around. But I know you’re still in the middle of your grace period, so that’s not an issue. And yes, we both know Topher has money. He’s a Stanton. He’s got more money than he knows what to do with, and don’t you think that might terrify him just a little bit? But he’s also got you, and I’m pretty sure you were one of the first to look at *him* instead of his money. So he didn’t have to have student loans or financial aid? If you get really strapped for cash, you have parents and siblings willing to help you out. Topher, too, but he’s not going to offer on anything except rent and groceries because he understands you have pride, too.