Memoirs of a Marijuana Mom

obvious opiods

//chapter three: obvious opiods.//

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Almost everyime my mom tried a, "new and improving invention to help with, back pain, neck pain, nerve pain and more!", she always ended back up at her original painkillers. At first, when everything slowly changed she had at most 5 pills, but by the next year she had 7, then 9, then 10, then more and she still cried at night. She had medications for her back, her neck, her nerves, her depression, her anxiety, and she still had to take her medications if she had colds or allergies.

I mean it's really deceiving too. When you watch these commercials of some 30-50 year-old men or women who are; waking their dog, or playing basketball, and are esthatic that their suffering went away because of this magic pill. The thing is though, half the time, the side effects are worse. One time when my dad took a medication he was talking in his sleep. However, my dad wasn't speaking English, he was speaking Urdu, and to this day neither him nor my mom knew what he would say.

And, I'm not saying all medications, are pain killers are bad, but most do more harm than actual good.

"Shit!" My mom yelled as she dopped her pill contanier. Pills of all shape, sizes, colors, and dosages flew out, hitting the floor to then scatter everywhere. My dad looked at me and I bolted up to help my mom. "No, Luna, it's fine." My mom groaned as she tried to bend down to retrieve them but I'd beaten her to it. I had at least 6 pills in my hand and gave them back to my mom.

This wasn't the first time it had happened, it happens in stores, other people's homes, schools, and even my mom's work. I'd help her but I didn't like it either, I looked like a poor person, looking and scraping for anything they could find.

I hated pills my whole life, still do, I get anxious from swallowing a pill too big, whether I choke on it or maybe I might just die, you never know. I mean these little things that you think are going to cure you but it never really does. Doctors promise that you're going to feel better and, you never do..

I remember every week or so, maybe once a month, my mom needed her prescriptions filled, I remember going with her to the Walmart Pharmacy and having to do a consultation because of some new medication. Or maybe it was the same medication she was getting, and she'd have to tell the pharmacist that no, she had this before, she knew what to do and knows the side effects. I mean when you go through that much, and you consulate for medication that will do nothing for you, it's not going to take the pain away, it's not going to get rid rid of it forever, it's just going to give you a high for a couple hours until you feel like you need another dosage but you can't get another dose because you overdose and that's not good either right?

Yet, drugs like cocaine do the same thing, give you a high, and by the time you need another high, you've overdosed.

Maybe that's what the doctors want, maybe they want more patients, maybe they want more people like my mom to be in agony and pain because of some things she can't control. All I knew my whole life was that some pills help and sometimes they don't, for people like my mom most don't. I wished for all my life, every wish chip I would wish the same thing, for my mom's back to be cured, for her to go back to normal, what I remembered her as.

I just wanted my mom back, but I guess it's too much to ask.

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hey guys, i'm so sorry i haven't updated in forever, school and family and crushes have been stressing me out, i hope you guys liked this, and i love you all so much!

love, salmie.