Ugly Woman Handsome Man

The second best smile

Chapter 2

The Second Best Smile 

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"Paati, (Grandma) I want to talk to God."

I was cuddled up to my maternal grandmother's bosom, my leg thrown over hers. The minute the relatives cleared the house after the tenth day of my mom's death, my dad had closed the door and rested on it, gazing at me. Words like 'I am sorry,' 'I didn't know where she was,' had gone through my head. But I couldn't convince even myself so I had not opened my mouth to talk.

The thrashing he gave me or the screams I had made as his fists and palms had connected to my body had been audible to the neighbours. Unfortunately for the both of us, my school had closed for the summer holidays and neither of us could escape the oppression of the house. The only reason he had not killed me was probably my mother's last request.

"Don't hurt her."

He had interpreted that to his convenience by flaying my skin open with his belt within an inch of my life. When I had woken up from my faint, I had heard an argument raging in the next room.

"She is nothing but a murderer," my dad yelled. I huddled in a ball on my bed but I could still hear everything.

"She is a child. It was not her fault." My grandma said vehemently but I could sense the pain in her voice. My dad was right. I am a murderer. I killed my own mom. That was unfair, wasn't it? I was the one who lost the balance, so it should have been me who should have died with my neck snapped open and blood streaming out of my mouth.

"If that is the case why don't you take her with you? I don't want her. I wish you luck with seeing that ugly face that killed your only child and my only love."

His voice broke in the end and I felt my salty tears burning the wounds on my face. I left my home the next morning, tears dried up. As the car left the compound, kids watching us leave gave a huge cheer. The demon had left the house.

"Ah dear, does anyone know where he is?" her voice was wistful, sad.

"Amma would have known," I said firmly, though crying, "She knew everything."

"Yes, she is with God now. She would know everything." Her hand gently caressed my head, threading my hair. It was the only place that did not hurt.

"I have something to ask God," I said, looking at grandma hopefully.

"What is it, honey?"

"Do you think God could take me and give mom back?"

That would be awesome. Dad would be so happy if mom came back. But grandma sobbed and I understood that is not possible. Unfair.

The days rolled to weeks. I spent the entire time inside the house, merely watching TV or visiting the doctor. This one probed my eyes repeatedly too. At the end of the first month of my holidays, I heard my grandma fighting on the phone with bone-shaking rage.

I watched her from the threshold, unsure if I can go in.

"Oh, that is a very nice excuse," scowled grandma, "Just admit that you were horny."

What did that mean?

"No, of course I don't expect that but within a month of her death- oh don't you use that as an excuse after throwing the kid out of your home. What happened to my only love- hello? Hello? You sick bastard!"

She screamed the last as she placed the phone back on its cradle with force. She swung around and caught me staring at her.

She raised her arms to me and I rushed to her, cuddling in to her embrace.

"Aiyo, kutti what is going to happen to you now?" She was sobbing and I had no idea why.

*

I climbed out of the car, seeing the wretched apartments again. I did not want to go there. My dad was there and I was scared to be alone with him.

"Paati, I will stay with you, please?"

Paati hugged me and with difficulty raised me in her arms.

"Your dad won't let me, honey," she said, her face crumpled with an emotion I had never seen before. "Promise me that you will stay out of their way."

I didn't understand what she said but I nodded, eager to see that expression wiped out of her face. It didn't work. She kissed my cheeks soundly and pressed the calling bell.

I wriggled down and she grasped my hand. The door opened and I stared at the toes of an unknown person.

"Come in," said the beautiful woman and stepped aside. I stared at her. Who was she?

"Where is he?" asked grandma. I cringed. I didn't want to meet dad.

"Bathing. Sit down, please."

We sat together and she called, "Lallu, come out here."

Someone shuffled out of my bedroom and I stared at the girl who should be about my age. She stared at my eyes and I looked down quickly.

"Say hello," said the woman.

I looked at grandma questioningly but she raised her eyebrows at the beautiful woman who lowered to her knees before me.

"Hi dear, what is your name?"

"Janani," I said, pressing myself against my grandma's side.

"I am Karunya. Your mom," she smiled.

I frowned. "My mom's name is Pavithra."

"I know but I would like it if you called me mom too. Can you?"

I look at grandma for guidance again. She nodded and I nodded at the woman. At mom.

"Good," she caressed my cheek, "Meet your sister, Lalitha."

I looked at the girl from my room who still stared at me. I ducked again quickly but new mom scolded her and she came to me, offering her hand to me.

"Hello," I mumble, not looking at her.

"Are you Janani?" she asked.

I nod and she said, "I am Lalitha. Lallu. Do you play Snake and Ladder?"

I nod.

"Now?"

I nod again, smiling and looking at her now.

We walk in to my room, our room and I believed that I had gotten my first friend.

An hour later, when grandma started, she kissed my cheeks.

"I think you just might make it through, honey," she smiled and whispered in my ears, "Keep away from your dad."

I nod.

After she left, I moved to our room again, banging my knee on the table, making a glass of water totter slightly and spill. My dad glares at me but my new mom wipes it out without question.

"Are you hurt?" she asks kindly and I shook my head.

She had the second best smile in the universe.

Sorry for the short chapter! This one is dedicated to my sister, paddy_chandran. My staunch support through all my endeavours. Love her.