Just a thief (Ban x Reader)

10. Let me apologize

Ban's POV

I ran and ran, never wanting to stop. I had to get to her, I had to tell her. She was the most important thing to me in the world and I hurt her. I shattered her heart and broke her trust. She was like this because of what I did. How could I forget? Now that I watched my memories of us together in my mind I remembered them. During my ten years in prison she was all that I thought about. There was that thief that I couldn't help but fall for. She was so beautiful yet so alone. But why? Its my fault, its all my fault. She doesn't want to get hurt again, is that why she is so distant? I changed her, I made her this way. My fault, all my fault. Yes I was finally there, I saw the girls all sitting underneath a tree. I need to tell her I need to tell her now.

Your POV

The girls and I sat underneath a tree, relaxing in the cool shade. In the distance I could see someone running towards us. But who? As they got closer I realised who. It was Ban. The last person I wanted to see. "(Y/n)!", he called. Why me? Why is it my name that he calls? "(Y/n)!". I don't respond, I don't want to. He hurt me, he broke me. I'm nothing, just an empty void. I have nothing, I own nothing, I am nothing. And to me he is nothing, just like everything else. However I have Ava, even though I love her with all my heart I hate that I am the one who is her mother. Why? I could've given her up for adoption but I didn't. Why? Why didn't I? Because I didn't want to be alone anymore, I was sick and tired of it. It made me feel empty and unimportant. How come my family was the one to go? Why was it my sister who was beaten to death? Why did they make me watch? Why?! I sigh and look at the ground. The girls stood protectively in front of me. "Just let me talk to her", Ban growls at them. They cross their arms and send him glares. "No, you hurt her, you should just leave", Dianne says. "I need to explain, you don't understand!". "We understand Ban, we know exactly what kind of person you are", Merlin says, gritting her teeth. "Please just let me talk to her", he begs. "I'm sorry Ban but we can't and won't let you hurt her again", Elizabeth says quietly. Ban clenches his fists and then sighs, relaxing his body. "Fine, I'll leave I guess". He turns and begins walking away, a frown on his face.

Ban's POV

I walk away frowning. I just want to apologize yet they won't let me. I want to fix my mistake but I'm 11 years too late. At least she has her daughter. I hate that she has a daughter. I'm jealous, I wanted her to have my daughter, be my wife, be my everything. But I was too selfish, I walked away from the best thing I had ever had. I used to have Elaine and I loved her with all of my heart but (Y/n)... I loved her more. We were the same her and I, we were good people in a bad world. Making us bad people, making us do things that we regret. I walked back into the Boar hat and sunk into a seat at the bar, resting my face in my folded arms. I didn't want to talk to anyone, I just wanted to tell (Y/n) that I'm sorry.

That night was the last night before we would arrive in Vaizel. I sat alone on one side of the room while the others sat on the other. I watched them. They seemed to be having fun, laughing and such. I wish I could be part of that but I would just ruin it. As soon as I walk over the girls would just snob me and it would only be Meliodis, Gowther and I. Now I know how she feels, alone, like no one cares about her. I sigh and sip my drink, I could watch her laugh all night but as soon as she sees me she will stop. The glare she sends me every time I see her is like a stab in the heart. I feel like I'm slowly dying yet I'm immortal so I can't. The pain is more unbearable then any physical pain. Oh no, she's seen me and wait for it... there it is. The glare and the stab in the heart. I sigh and stand up, walking towards the staircase. "Where are you going?", Meliodis asks. I shrug my shoulders. "To sleep or something". I continue up the stairs and then into my room. I plop down onto my bed and stare at the ceiling.

Flashback

 I sat alone in my cold cell. It was so dark and I couldn't even see anything. It had been two weeks since I left (Y/n) and I was feeling unbearable guilt. Why did I leave her? Because I didn't want to lose her. Stupid right? I stared at the wall and then looked over into the corner of the cell as I see a dim light coming from it. It was in the shape of a woman and she was crying. She looked up and then I knew exactly who she was. It was (Y/n). She was talking to her self, interrupting herself with her own cries. "D-don't worry (Y/n), he'll come back, he said he loves you, he can never take that back", she whispers, rocking herself back and forwards. My heart clenched, is this really her? "Ban would never leave me right? Right? He'll come back, he can't leave me alone". Then she had a look of anger on her face and she punched the ground, then fell onto it. Laying huddled in a fetal position, still crying. "Who am I kidding? I'm worth nothing to him. I'm always going to be alone, always. No one even cares". I tried to move closer to the (Y/n). "(Y/n) its me", I say. She doesn't reply she just keeps crying. "I'm nothing, I'm just a thief". She said it over and over and over again until I felt like I was going insane. "(Y/n) please stop", I beg. But she doesn't. I put my hands over my ears and try to block the cries out but its somehow inside my head. "Please stop this (Y/n) I-I-L love you". She stops crying and sits on her knees staring at the ground. Her voice goes from its normal sweet self into a lifeless monotone one. "No one will ever love me". My eyes widen, no this isn't what I wanted. I ran over to her but when I tried to hug her I fazed right through her, as if she was a ghost. I kept trying to touch her but my hand out go right through her. Then she looked me right in the eyes, her eyes cold and lifeless. "I hate you Ban".

Flashback end

My eyes snap open and I sit up sweating. I wipe my fore head and sigh, laying back down. I heard the door creak and I looked up, (Y/n) was standing there. I just sighed and looked away, she didn't want to talk to me, I wasn't surprised if she never wanted to see me again. I can hear her foot steps walking away and sigh again. I wanted to be with her... even if it was just so that she would forgive me. I want her to be able to look at me without glaring. I want her to look to me for protection like she used to. I want her to trust me again, I want her to love me again.

This was mostly in Ban's POV so now you know more of his side of the story. But he never got to say sorry. Tbh if someone did that to you you probably wouldn't forgive them but yeah... this is a fanfiction where all your dreams come true. Taadddaaaaa hope you enjoyed. WE are almost at 1k reads on this book so keep re-reading my story. Nah jk anyway vote and follow me for more. Thank ya XD