Chapter Six

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*italics are flashbacks!

When Harry woke up, he didn’t even have a thought about leaving. He honestly didn’t have the energy. Last night overwhelmed him. So he just laid on side and watched Louis’ back, who was turned away from him. He watched his slow and steady breaths from behind. He could hear his soft breath in the silence that they were both in. He sat there and just thought.

He thought about all the things he told Louis so far. It scared him to think that he could be so …open to someone he barely knew. He was startled when Louis shifted next to him, laying on his back now. Harry laid still, watching his peaceful sleeping face. His eyes wandered over his features - his lips were so pink as his tongue swept over them coating them. He was so - so pretty. He looked so beautiful, like he didn’t have a care in the world while he slept and Harry wanted so badly just to lay against his chest and sleep in peace along with him. He realized that the night before was one of the first full-on night sleeps that he has had in a while. No nightmares woke him and it made him feel safe. Especially since Louis lay next to him, even if they weren’t touching. He focused back on the sleeping boy next to him. He lifted his hand and placed it on Louis’ arm slowly, which lay outside of the  blanket that was shared between the two of them. His fingers moved softly against his arms, watching as his fingertips moved a few of his arm hairs. He was touching Louis so lightly - like he was afraid that he would wake up any second. His eyes flickered from Louis’ arm to his face, checking to see if his eyes were open. After a few minutes, he pulled his arm back to himself and he closed his eyes, thinking.

~*~

Right when Harry’s eyes opened, he knew what day it was. He knew it was going to be a shitty day because he knew that his Mum was going to be crazy. He didn’t even want to leave his bed, even the thought scared him. So he waited. He waited for his mum to stumble into his room in the middle of the afternoon, drunk. Because they both knew what day it was. The 2 year anniversary of his father’s death.

Sure, his mum hit him. She hit him plenty of times. She was terrible to him. But on the one year since his father’s death, she was 50 maybe even 100 times worse than she was to him daily. He didn’t even want to think about how she would be today. It seemed as if when time went on, she got worse and more violent. The love she had for her son was fading into the dark place where his mother used to be. Someone who used to be so happy and so loving to her son was gone. It was so hard for Harry to just leave - like his sister did a year ago. He should have just left with her - like she had practically begged him to. But he couldn’t just leave his mum behind. Her being so helpless and so sad. things turned around though. Harry, trying to be caring, turned into his mum’s personal punching bag to release her stress and anger. Then she started drinking, wasting her money on drugs, and sleeping around. Probably for more money for more drugs. Harry knew it too.

He hated waking up in the middle of the night, hearing his mum walk inside around 4AM, laughing, drunk, then hearing another man’s voice with her. There were a couple of times when she would open Harry’s door and show the man that she brought home how she could hit Harry and Harry wouldn’t do anything back. And all the man would do was just laugh. Sometimes he really wanted to do something back, tell her to stop, anything. He knew that he should have done something a long time ago now - but he felt too guilty. She was his mother and he felt like maybe, just maybe, the women who loved him was still in there.

When she does open the door that morning, she walks over and pulls his hair. She yanks it, pulling him out of his bed and onto the floor. Harry sits up, “What the hell?!” He shouts at her.

She stands in front of him, a bottle of vodka in one hand, and a knife in the other. It was a normal knife though, nothing too serious, but it was still a knife. She gave him a wicked smile before swatting the knife towards him, “Remember what day it is?” She said, missing Harry’s hand by a few centimeters. “2 years ago you killed Daddy. All your fault.” Her words slurred, “If I wouldn’t have had you, you fucking piece of trash, I’d still have him. I would fucking kill you, you worthless bitch, just for him to come back. But I can’t now. He’s already dead.” She threw the bottle next to Harry, the glass shattered. Some glass got stuck in Harry’s arm as he cursed softly under his breath. His mum began to sob, “You deserve to die.” She whispered, crying harder, falling to the ground next to Harry.

“Mum.. It wasn’t my fault.. Please just stop.. we can go through this together. You don’t have to be alone..” Harry said, his eyes swelled up with tears along with his mum. He leaned over and laid his hand on her back lightly.

“Oh. but it is your fault,” She said shaking her head and letting out a laugh. She shoved Harry off of her and stood up. She grabbed whatever was on Harry’s desk and began to throw them at him. First, a vase. She threw it at full force. It collided with his face, shattering instantly.

Harry chocked back a sob, “Stop.” He could feel blood dripping down his neck, he ignored it though. He could barely breath at everything that was happening right now.

She then grabbed his stereo. She threw it and it hit his chest. He let out a gasp because he knew it must have at least broken his rib. It fucking hurt like hell.

She continued doing this for the whole day - punishing him, until she passed out on the couch later than Harry thought she would. When she did, Harry immediately ran to the park, calling Louis.

~*~

The memories from yesterday were interrupted when he felt someone’s fingertips brushing against his cheeks. He opened his eyes - realizing how tightly he had his eyes shut closed. He realized he had tears falling rapidly down his cheeks and onto the blanket next to him. He opened his mouth and a startling sobbing noise choked out of his throat. Louis moved closer to Harry and laid his arm around his waist, “Shh..” He whispered, kissing the top of Harry’s head.

Harry snuggled into his chest, crying harder. “I-I’m s-sorry.” Harry cried, glancing back up at Louis. Tears still fell but he was able to catch his breath.

“You’re okay..” Louis said quietly, wiping away the tears that fell. Harry closed his eyes at the gentle touch from the boy.

“No, I’m not. I’m so fucking messed up. Why couldn’t I just be born into a normal family? Why can’t I have a normal Christmas anymore and birthday parties like everyone else does? I remember when my mum and dad would wake me up with a cake on my birthday. I would always rub it in my sister’s face because she would never get one, because I felt special. I miss it so much. I miss him.” He said, wiping away a few tears, “Why did Aiden have to fucking die..? He didn’t deserve it. Fuck, I miss him so much.” He murmured to himself softly.

Louis stayed silent for a few minutes, he couldn’t decide if he wanted to ask Harry. But he did, “Who was Aiden..? I heard you mention him a few times..” Harry stayed silent, seeming as if he was trying to stop himself from crying harder. “You don’t have to answer.. I was just curious. Sorry—”

“No, it’s okay..” He sighed, shifting his position next Louis. It seemed as if he pressed closer to him. “He was ..m-my best friend.. God, we were inseparable. We did so much stupid stuff together..” He felt his lips wobble and he couldn’t even continue talking, he was running out of breath because of how many tears were falling.

“I don’t want to make you cry. You can tell me about him another time. Yeah?” Louis asked, brushing some of his curls out of his face. Harry nodded once and closed his eyes.

“Did Eleanor see me?”

“I don’t think so.” He smiled, moving another curl out of Harry’s face. 

“I’m going to call my friend Niall and see if I can stay at his house.” He paused, opening his eyes and looking up at Louis, spotting his frown, “I heard your fight with Eleanor and I’m not going to be a reason for you guys to get into fights.”

“It was hardly even a fight. I was just telling her that you could stay here for as long as you wanted and she didn’t want to lose her job because of it.”

Harry gave him a weak smile because Louis wanted him to stay. Someone finally wanted him to stay instead of wanting him to leave. And he wanted to stay, but he knew he couldn’t. He felt wanted, something he hasn’t felt in such a long time. 

“I’ll be fine.” He smiled softly, “Promise.”

“Fine. But if he won’t let you stay, you’re coming back here. Promise on that?”

“Yes Lou. I promise.” He grinned, closing his eyes again, with his face pressed against Louis

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