lover you don't have to love

1

i've been laying in my bed next to a girl who wishes i was hers only for 8 hour before the sun begins to rise. i couldn't sleep at all last night, i usually can't. this time i could attach the insomnia to something though. tour jitters or something. jac stirs in her sleep and reaches over to make sure i'm there and settles when she feels my chest. i rest my arm over my forehead and breath out. the sun shines in through the window and warms my skin. i bask in it. i hear a knock from the living room and i groan before getting up. what the hell do you want. what the hell could you possibly want. i open the door to reveal a smiling spencer holding two cups of coffee. how is he always this happy so early in the god damn morning. "good morning ry, brought you coffee." "piss off." i mumble, taking the coffee. "tour starts tomorrow, you ready?" no. "yeah sure." i shrug. i take a sip of the coffee and hiss when it burns the roof of my mouth. "ouch." i frown, and take another sip. "we get to see the tour bus today, i'm excited. finally out of that crammed white van." spencer chuckles. i hum in agreement. jac walks out of the room in my undershirt and panties rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. "morning." she smiles at us brightly. "oooo coffee!" she says and grabs my coffee and bring it to her mouth. she makes a face when she pulls back. "ouch." "that's what you get for taking what's not yours." i say, not kidding. she laughs.

me and spencer drive over to meet our manager pete a few hours later. he's standing next to a huge tour bus when we get out of the car. he pats its side affectionately when he sees us eyeing it. "isn't she something." he sighs dreamily. "go on and check it out, this is where we're going to be for the next 3 months. patrick and jon will be here soon but you guys can go ahead. i'll give you a tour!" pete exclaims and climbs up the stairs to the bus, motioning us to follow. i step inside and am greeted by a lounge area that's decorated in neutral tones. "this is the lounge area where you guys can talk and laugh and drink. maybe even play cards or something to pass the time." pete explains. he moves us to the back of the bus where the bunks are. "this is where we'll all sleep, and there's the bathroom." he says, pointing at a small door. "and that's the tour! any questions?" pete smiles at me and spencer like this is the best thing that's ever happened. far from it. "looks cool." spencer says. "i like it." i nod to show that i agree, i guess. "hey guys!" jon calls and i look over where the voice is coming from. "this bus is such an upgrade." patrick says, taking a seat on the couch. "i know! and this is just the beginning. if you guys will work with me we can have private jets in no time." pete chirps. i rub my hands over my face. i'm already tired of this.

jac makes us dinner when i get home. she says something about how this will be our last meal together for quite a long time. she places my plate in front of me before setting down her own. "i'm really going to miss you." jac frowns, pushing around her corn with her spoon. "i know baby but you know there's no room on that bus. it's only three months." i assure her. she smiles sadly and sighs. "i know. i just don't know what i'll do while your gone." she says, brushing her hair behind her ear to reveal a bruise on her neck from where i bit down when i came last night. marked. mine when i'm not hers. i eat half of the food that's on my plate before throwing the rest in the trash. jac grimaces. it's like i'm throwing away something more then leftovers. "thanks for dinner. i have to go meet the band before we leave for chicago tonight." jac leaves her plate and crosses the room to wrap her arms around me. her face is pressed into the crook of my neck so her "i love you" is muffled. "love you too." i say simply. "i'll see you in a few months." i pull away and grab my luggage from the couch and walk out the front door without looking back.