I can’t function.
I can’t do anything.
My problems are pouring over the edge of my skull,
dripping and flowing all over the floor,
waiting for me to slip again.
I lie on the linoleum floor, twisted into a ball,
swimming in my broken hopes and dreams, shattered expectations and torn realities.
I stay there for hours it seems,
until the spilled problems and issues soak back into my skin,
and I drag myself back to my feet,
trying to make them take me to my bed.
I lie there, waiting to fall into another one of my numb sleeps, which usually last for a couple of days.
There I stay until the demon inside of me pulls the strings,
forcing me up like a puppet to take on the world again.
Then it’s another Monday, where I stare blankly at the walls that are imprisoning me in the social anxiety and stresses that are high school.
I wander the halls aimlessly, making no attempt to get to my next class in time.
Then it’s mid-afternoon again,
and I limp myself back home to sit at my empty desk and think of all the things I have to get done.
How long it’ll take me, how much time it’ll take up, the amount of brain power and energy it’ll take me to do all of it…
and I’m crumpling to the floor again,
my issues pouring all over the floor again,
and I’m falling into an endless rabbit hole with no escape.