Feel Again

Prologue

One of the downside of knowing Lyle Allen since the beginning of time is the fact that you just can't 'Unknow' him.

For some ridiculous and horrendous reason, his simplest most stupid mannerisms, and his most overbearing, most sadistic habits are embedded into my very being.

It's like I'm designed to know him; the way his hazel eyes twinkle whenever he's planning something diabolical that will ensure my utter downfall, the way he laughs whenever he successfully irritated the heck out of me, the way he continually runs his hand to his dark brown hair when he's frustrated, the way he rubs the back of his neck when his nervous, the way he pursed his lips when he's trying to hide the truth, the way he cried when we were eight because he thought some clown managed to kill me, the way he dresses when it's my birthday which was all purple because that's my favourite colour and because he knows it reminded me of our favourite childhood gay dinosaur, Barney, and the way he despises cats because he's allergic to them.

And for the most part, he was designed to know me.

He knows I have asthma, knows that I'm afraid of clowns (almost killed me), knows that I love to draw, knows how I wanted to dye my brown hair red which he thinks was ridiculous, knows how much of a frustrated singer I am, knows how much I hated carrots from day one, how seriously allergic I am to daffodils, and how much of an avid nerd I truly am.

I never thought that it was possible to know someone so much.

But I've never imagined how much frustrating and heart-wrenching it was to see the person I thought I knew, unfold and be the person that he really was.

There's nothing more painful than seeing, Lyle Allen, the person I thought I knew for fifteen years, changed into a person I have never expected him to be.

He was supposed to be mean, rude, arrogant, malicious, and frustrating, but he smiles a genuine smile, and even if it was sometimes the smuggest, most conceited smile I see, I'd be happy to take it any day.

But now, he doesn't laugh like he used to let alone smile or associate himself in any human contact possible. He changed.

He became the most unfeeling person I know.

I don't know him anymore. And I have no idea why.

The worst part of knowing Lyle Allen is the fact that you just can't 'Unknow' him but he can 'Unknow' you.

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I'm sort of new at writing, and I do appreciate constructive criticism. Let me know your thoughts, comments, and suggestions! Have a great day! (: