Harry,
Where do I even start? Well…I suppose the beginning is a good idea, yeah?
So, when I met you, you were in a hospital for the "insane" because of anger issues. Right from the start I was told never to touch you and no flirting whatsoever because both things got on your nerves.
I am not a flirt, just really random, so that didn't faze me at all. I also wasn't very sure why they told me not to touch you…I mean, we didn't even know each other, so why would I be touching you already? Even I find that kind of disturbing when I think about it.
Anyway, that's beside the point. I met you after being 'warned' and we talked for a while…but I really felt like I was just annoying you so I left. You told me not to leave, but at the time I had figured you were just trying to be nice, and so I ignored you and went home.
By the time I got changed and had laid on the couch, bored out of my mind, there was a knock on the door. Considering that it was a little past midnight, I got really confused, but I still answered the door – and thank God that I did because otherwise we probably wouldn't be together and I don't even want to begin to imagine my life without you in it. I'd probably get fat and die alone with like fifty cats or something pathetic like that.
We talked for a while again once I let you inside and you held me…you did not like touching anyone…but you held me on your lap in your arms…and I don't think you have even the slightest idea of how much that means to me.
The thing that was even more shocking than that was when you asked me to be your girlfriend. I could've sworn I must have heard you wrong; that's how surprised I was. But I said yes because even though we had just met, there was an undeniable feeling I had for you already.
I kind of felt like – as crazy as it may sound – there might be something there between us and that maybe, just maybe, I could help you with your anger issues.
You went back that night even though I would have rather you stayed with me. The next day I got you cleared to leave that horrid place for two days.
I wanted more time and I didn't think the time I had been allotted to try to help you get "better" was anywhere near to fair compared to how long you had been in the hospital. However, I knew that it would be the most time I would get no matter how much I begged/pleaded for longer, so I took it and I'm so, so grateful that I even had the chance to "fix" you.
From the start I knew that all you needed was for someone to love you and show you what love was. To be completely honest, I didn't know if I, myself, was capable of doing that for you or even anyone else, for that matter. But still I wanted to try my hardest to do whatever you needed to get you out of that place. Something about it didn't feel right to me from the moment I walked in the doors.
I never told you this, but I actually went there to talk to patients for a class I was taking at university at the time on psychology. When I talked to you, though, that hadn't even crossed my mind once.
You intrigued me; partially because around me you seemed so calm and carefree.
I remember how I was excited when I made you laugh for the first time and then you laughed again because of it. Making people laugh and smile happens to be what I do best, but for whatever reason it seemed like even more of an accomplishment than usual. Maybe it was because of your 'condition' that I felt that way about it, I don't know.
That first day you stayed with me I ordered pizza because you didn't even know if you liked it and that was just terrible since I think I could probably eat pizza every day for the rest of my life if I had to pick one food. Obviously, you liked it a lot just like I thought and hoped you would.
After that I had my friend Max come over for you to start boxing. I was pretty nervous about it, to be honest. I know I asked you first if you would be interested in it, but I didn't know if you were just saying that so I didn't feel bad. It all seemed to be going really well…until you punched him in the face… I really could've cared less if you had or hadn't done that (oops?).
You swore you didn't actually mean to do it, he just kept doing something that was irritating you. When I asked you what he was doing, you said that he kept looking at me and hitting on me.
Maybe it makes me a complete weirdo to find that sweet and even kind of romantic, but I don't care, I thought it was so oh well.
I know you didn't really believe me when I said that I don't even pay any attention to him, but I hope you do by now. At least know that I will NEVER leave you for him; he's definitely not worth my time even in the slightest bit.
You, on the other hand, I would waste the rest of my life on even if it turned out to be completely pointless.
Sorry, I'll get back to the topic of this; I have ADD, don't judge me if I tend to ramble and get off topic a lot, which I'm sure I've already done plenty of times while writing this… cx Okay, okay, back to the story.
So after two days, we went back to the hospital so they could evaluate any changes in behaviour and whatnot.
The doctor was completely shocked by how much you were touching me and even held me while we were there.
When he left the room and you told me that they hit you all the time, I was definitely more angry than I was shocked, and I was determined to get that place shut down.
We never went back after that and two months later the hospital was closed by the government.
All of those doctors and/or nurses had their licenses revoked and will never be able to go back into practicing medicine in any way, shape, or form.
You were free from that burden and left to live with me.
Well, that's the end of this entry…but I'm sure I'll write more…I love you. ❤
~*~ April 28, 2014 ~*~
