Pondering Questions

Toothbrush

Okay. Well. we're back for Day 2. Who knew. So, if last year's politics weren't enough to drive you insane, wait until you finish reading this load of waste. Anyway, toothbrush. Or toothbrushes. Or toothbrushi. No idea.

Anyway, toothbrushi/es. I am thankful for my toothbrush. Only because the sole reason for it is to not make people drop dead at my ratbreath. Joking. It keeps me drop dropping dead at other people's ratbreath. But I wonder if people appreciate them. When they brush their teeth, do they think: Well. That's another 5 minutes I'll never get back...

But what happened to the toothbrush? Once upon a time, there was this thing called a stick. The gorillas liked the stick and attacked leaves to it. Then, they found that if they rubbed some of the leaves against their teeth, it got the yellow nasty stuff off. Today, there are millions of different types. Different handles for different people. Rotating bristles and even an on and off switch. And this is pretty confusing. Because a toothbrush has one main mission: To clean your teeth. What is a mini flashlight attachment or a music button going to do?

Nothing.

Just like my opinions and sarcastic comments.

But oh well.

It's unnecessary. Imagine a cookie. Just a cookie. Then, you decide the cookie isn't good enough. So you add bristles. Now the cookie is chunky. Then, that still doesn't satisfy. So you add a handle. Now the cookie is a chunky kebab. But, it doesn't look good enough. So you add music. Now it's a chunky kebab singing the Jonas Brothers. Would you want to eat that chunky Jonas Brother kebab?

Hell no.

So why add all this fancy stuff to make it even more unappetizing? To try and sell it? Because let me tell you. I'm not buying that chunky Jonas Brother kebab. At all.

But this is my own little ashcan, so I'm here to rant. But sadly, my fingers are turning numb from typing for so long and my arm is falling asleep. Wonderful. The actual fact here is that my whole arm is going through some major hyperkinesis. And I'd feel better if I wasn't about to have a seizure on my upper right part of my body. But some things I do enjoy are making people look stupid, calling people's bluff, and getting the last word. Least to say, I'm a sardonic crap. But, I do enjoy it.

Anyway, toothbrush. Ooh! Right-Brained me is alive! She's climbing up the mountain! And she's back! Uh oh... Left-Brained me does not look happy... Aaand Left-Brained me has kicked her down the mountain slope.

Couldn't be more fabulous.

Anyway, toothbrushes/i are one of the many wonders of America. And no one will ever probably understand marketing these days. Buy this! It has this! Well... No thanks. I'd rather crawl back into my Hobbit Hole, thank you.