Letting JEA Go

Kabanata 1:

Hindi ko alam kung bakit takot na akong magmahal ulit.

Maybe, it's because i've been hurt once. 'Yung tipong sakit na sobra, 'yung sakit na kahit saang anggulo mo tignan ganun parin. Ganu'n parin yung sakit.

Kung dati may dahilan pa kong umiyak ng dahil sa kanya. Ngayon, hindi ko na alam kung pa'no.

Kung pa'no ko ipapakitang hindi ako apektado ng sakit na nararamdaman ko sa t'wing makikita ko syang kasama ang...

"Gi, kaasar ka! Ngayon ka na nga lang bumalik dito sa Antipolo eh. Tulala ka pa! Parang tanga lang be." - asar na sabi ng bestfriend kong si faith.

Kakabalik ko lang galing Tarlac, I've been there for 3 years? I guess.

"Tsk, Namiss lang kita. Napaka selan mo naman be. Haha!"- bawi ko sakanya.

That's half truth though. I badly miss my bestfriend. Yung bestfriend kong super protective. Yeah, that's faith. My bestfriend, My best buddy!

"Nakausap mo na sya?"- biglang tanong nya.

I know what she's talking about but I don't want her to see my reaction.
I feel suddenly dizzy after hearing her question.

"Sino?"- I innocently asked her.

I don't want her to notice my reaction. I don't want her to know about how I feel.

I can see her in my peripheral vision, she's looking at me intently.

"Ely? Nakita mo na ba sya?"- Tanong nya.

God, my bestfriend used to be so sensitive. What the hell happened to her? Isn't it obvious that I'm doing my best just to kill the topic? Tsk,

"Hindi. Kararating ko lang be. You don't expect me to find him as soon as I come back here, right?"- Sagot ko without looking at her.

"Malay mo."- maikling sagot nya sabay iwas ng tingin.

I look away. Baka kasi 'di ko makayanan at bigla na lang akong humagulgol dito.

Right, I'm still affected. I'm still am.

I just sigh and smile with my thought.

Really, Gi? May mahal ng iba eh. Huli ka na. Masaya na sya, kahit wala ka na sa tabi nya.

Ang sakit. Ang sakit pala! Shit.